onikins: (Let it rip)
Onida "Oni" Girard ([personal profile] onikins) wrote in [community profile] sixwordstories 2015-08-23 04:10 am (UTC)

Cue a giant hole in the ground, so she can fall in it

[Would Oni ever stop assuming that she was older than everyone else? Probably not. Really, she ought to know better. The she-wolf was entirely too tipsy to have kept track of how many liters Bill has managed to put away-- She only knew it was alot. Thinking back on her one and a half, maybe two liters... Perhaps it was he, and not she, who would be getting his stomach pumped tonight.]

Two pitchers in five minutes? Lucky I know a good doctor, 'cause you're fixin' t'find out if I remember any o' that CPR trainin' she tried t'show me. [Hint: She doesn't.]

Just O--oh, hell. Nevermind. [She was beginning to suspect that the battle of the surnames was one that she was never going to win. The she-wolf cringed sympathetically when Bill's muzzle tripped him up. Believe it or not, Oni knows all too well how a long snout can get in the way, particularly when she's sticking her nose where it doesn't belong.]

Y'gotta turn yer head to th'side, darlin'. Like this-- [The broom handle was, again, not much shorter than the she-wolf. She hardly had to bend her back at all, but she made one miscalculation: Oni forgot how drunk she was, and when she turned her head to demonstrate to Bill how best to avoid hitting the pole with one's face it was hard to tell just where the damned thing was anymore. It grazed her cheek and clattered noisily to the floor.] Putain de merde.

[Grumbling murderous French obscenities, she dipped her own pitcher into the keg and proceeded to swill it to the best of her ability. She might have said more, something to the tune of "It's your turn," but it was hard to say when she was doubled over, gasping for breath.] Dying... Dieux, donne-moi la puissance.

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