sixwordstories | (no subject)

Okays, okays! What's this so urgent for? Is it about Nathans not winning the election for president? Maybe we should have recounts, like they did in Florida that one time. Nathans is from Florida - he should wins it!

...

Sort of, Toki. This is about the taxes that the band will have to pay because of the new president's policies. I'm going to arrange a meeting but I would like you guys to consider moving out of the US.

You mean...leave Mordhaus? But I like it here! And I have all of my models arranged just the way I likes them!

But...I guess you knows best. Maybe we's can go live in Norway and have armored polar bears like in those books. (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_golden_compass) Do you think we can builds a new Mordhaus there, Mr. Ofdensen?

Stupid elections. Why can't we gets a pardon for being everyone's favorite band and totally metal?

Norway would be an option. I think we could manage to build a new Mordhaus, certainly.

My goal is to get the policy rethought. If you and the band are set on staying here, I'll make it happen but I'd like all our options covered.

I would like to stay here. Is there anything I can do?

Wait - they want our monies so theys can help people, right? Maybe if we do a big benefit concert and shows it on TV too, we can raise a lot of money and give it to them instead of them taking our taxes. It's just the same things, right? We're still helping peoples, right?

I'll handle it.

Not quite. While you would still be helping people, that would be considered a tax write-off. It will make your taxes lower but Dethklok brings in too much money. And the last charity concert was a bit of a disaster.

Hmm...so maybes if we do lots of benefits, like have a concert a week so's people come see us instead of going to church, and they gives the money to us so we's gives it out and helps people. That's better than church anyways - church just uses it to buy more colored windows.

But what do you mean, the last charity concert was a disaster? There was a big storm and everythings - it was totally metal!

That could actually cause inflation, Toki. Which would mean that money was worth less. Economics is a tricky subject. Why don't you just let me handle it?

...Nathan isn't going to make this easy, is he?

How could money be worths less? That's impossible! You're right, I think you should handle this - it's crazy.

Nathans REALLY doesn't want to go to Norway, Mr. Ofdensen. I think we's gonna have to makes our own country or something. Maybe gets an island, like the one where the kitties and Fatty Ding Dongs live, only we'd be there on it instead. Just build a new Mordland right there. No, I know! We builds an island that looks like Face Bones (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Palm_Islands), and then we builds the new Mordhaus on that!

What's wrong with Norway? It would appeal to the Scandinavian fanbase.

It's impractical to start a new country, and it would take quite a bit of time. An island, however, is worth looking into as maybe a nice vacation spot.

This better be important.

Mr. Ofdensen says we may have to leave Mordhaus, Nathans! It's all because Barak Obama's stupid taxes!

I think you should run again, right now, so wes don't have to leave!

Wait, what? LEAVE Mordhaus? And go where?

Why can't we just refuse to pay the taxes? ...Am I allowed to run again? Can we like, say it was rigged?

Mr. Ofdensen says we has to leave Mordhaus because it's in the United States, and the new president gonna makes us pay more taxes! I don't know where wes goes - we could always goes tos Norway and rebuild Mordhaus and has armored polar bears like in that one book (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_golden_compass). They could be pals with the yard wolves!

I thinks you should runs again, Nathans. Or better yet, have them recount the votes in Florida, like they did that one time. You're from Florida! And yous was the governor! You should gets it!

...But I don't WANT to leave the United States. FUCK that. Lilith is here and unless she can come to Norway too...Do you think she could?

You're right. I could totally be president. And I'd say we would have NO TAXES. Because taxes fucking suck.

...How do I tell them, like...like, how do I tell them to recount the votes?

I don't want to leave either! I likes America, with its food libraries and its candy and its golf courses and its hobby shops! Where am I's gonna buy model airplanes in Norway, huh?

But if we dos goes to Norway, I think Lilith could come. She may need to gets that card, though. Visa card? It's a credit card, but it lets you stays in other countries, I think.

Yeah, you tells 'em, Nathans! You go on television, and you says yous running for President, and when you're President, there's no more taxes ever again! And I thinks you gets them to recount the votes with lawyers. You gots to get some lawyers in there and tells them to sue everyone until they recount the votes and you're President!

And its hot chicks! ALSO. It's cold in Norway, isn't it?

Ohh. I thought that was a passport. She'd have to learn whatever language those people in Norway talk, too. ...Where would she live? With us? And what if she doesn't want to go to Norway? Because, that'd be fucking suck.

Ofdensen's our lawyer, right? So he needs to go sue people.

I wouldn't call a meeting if it wasn't, would I, Nathan?