sixwordstories | (no subject)

I wouldn't know, I'm afraid.

Never had the 'pleasure' of visiting, yourself, then?

The ante-however? No. Hell itself? Unfortunately.

*flicks the bloke a glance up and down*

Pissed off the wrong deity, did you?

*grim smile* Ex-wife, actually, who happens to be friends with some vengeful dieties. They don't approve of my...parenting techniques.

*barely bats an eyelid and slips a fag into his mouth, striking a match with a hiss and a puff of smoke. In a very casual voice, asks:*

What sort a' parenting techniques would those be then.

*not very politely, waves smoke away*

Only the ones most necessary. Our son is very...difficult. He needs discipline. Which he is most certainly not getting with HER.

*takes a long drag on the cigarette, listening with half-hooded eyes*

What's the kid do that's so bad then?

'N what d'you do to keep him in line?

*exhales, in the concerned disciplinarian's direction*

Some reason you decided to strike up a conversation with me?

Just lonesome? Figure I looked like a friendly bloke?

*scowls at the continuance of smoke* He's very difficult, stubborn, willful. I'm afraid it can take some...extreme measure to help him behave. Of course, I never did anything that wasn't in his best interest.

*calm expression* Actually I observed you speaking with my wife.

*snorts, then smirks*

Difficult, stubborn and willful. Sounds like me.

Oh did you? I talk to a lot of birds. Wasn't putting the moves on her or anything. No need to get jealous. Besides, I'm spoken for.

*takes another long drag and exhales*

So what's it you're wanting from me, then?

Those traits are, while unfortunate, acceptable in adults. Children...are a different story.

Yes, I did. Blonde woman, tall, answers to Saxsice? And I'm actually looking for my...OUR son.

Information.

Personally, I think kids should have a bit a' backbone. Don't believe in all that 'be seen and not heard, do as you're told and no back-chat' business. Especially since it's so often used by petty little bullies as an excuse to be arseholes...

*flicks a few ashes from the fag carelessly, then takes another long drag*

Don't think I've met any woman calling herself that name. Know a few tall blondes. But have you taken a look around? Gorgeous birds are ten a penny here.

Or is it only little boys you've got eyes for?

*fixes the bloke with a steady gaze, blue eyes intense*

Information? Sorry, do I look like an encyclopaedia?

There's a difference between backbone and defiance. *dismissively* If you knew the boy, you'd understand.

Ah. I see. *narrows eyes* It's my son I'm interested in locating, sir. And I assumed that since you were speaking to his mother, you might have some idea of where the child is.

*flicks the butt of the fag toward the bloke's shoes and shrugs*

Must not know the kid then.

So what was Hell like, for you?

*completely loses interest* Warm.

*walks off*

*smirks and puts up two fingers after the prick's back*

*Smirk* At least hell's less boring?

*sniggers and nods*

No bloody kidding mate. That's why s' the ante-room. And you should see the crap they make me wear here. I look like a git.

I never much minded the ceremonial stuff from my world. D'you get to wear a sword?

*snorts and sulks, arms folded. He is in fact, wearing black knee breeches with silver buttons at the sides, a short black jacket with a double row of silver buttons, white stockings that show off his lean, muscular calves to good advantage, highly glossed black boots, and a highly starched little ruff, and keeps grimacing and turning his head slightly from side to side as if being strangled by the ruff. His hair is VERY tidy and his face and hands and fingernails are VERY clean.*

Yeh well praps your ceremonial stuff didn't make you look like a complete git.

*looks a little envious*

You get a sword? I don't even get a _dagger_ til I'm accepted into the Order.

The only consolation is Angelus and the minions look like prats as well.

*With knee high boots, and minus the ruff...maybe a longer coat... Spike'd look pretty much like Giac, which isn't too far off the Nadherna ceremonial dress*

We get better boots. *He nods. Trying SO HRD not to laugh*

Silver edged sword, silver dagger, and a hardwood dagger. 'Course depending on the ceremony ..

*Corvo clears his throat. Most ceremonies he'd be dressed like a slave and he's NOT describing that to Spike*

Drake'd refuse to wear anything that makes him look a tosser. Guess that's the advantage of being the boss.

*huffs through his nose softly. Figures, everybody else gets better boots than his*

Yeh. Angelus's are long. ...Bloody hell! *eyes widen a little, enviously, at the descriptions of the swords.* You have hardwood daggers? We just use a stake. Or a crossbow. But that's a bit girly.

Oh, well Angelus doesn't think he looks like a wanker. But in his day frills were normal for blokes.

Well, half the population are vamps, so daggers kinda evolved into specialist weapons. What? Crossbows are cool man! I'd love to get one.

Frills are okay, depends on the guy, ruffs though.. *And he's lost it. Corvo staggers about laughing* Ruffs man! You poor bastard!

Oh yeh, I _get_ why you got use hardwood daggers. I'm just bloody jealous cos you get to _have_ one. Angelus won't even let me play with a _stick_. I'm flipping _serious_. Over-protective...

Yeh, well crossbows are all right 'n all- s' just... where I'm from it's considered a bit girly to use distance weaponry. Blokes use hand-to-hand combat.

*doesn't mention he's not allowed to touch the crossbows either, and that Angelus made very pointed and emphatic threats about what would happen if he ever did muck about with them until he was given permission and supervised*

*grits his teeth and goes red when Corvo loses it. Grimaces and puts up two fingers*

Here's your 'rough', mate!

They don't even teach you combat skills? Man, we're taught that as children, everyone has to defend themselves.

Yeah but you can.. *He's about to say 'save a guys life from horseback', but then he still doesn't know what he's dealing with here, friend or no* ..Hit a moving target.

*He's still giggling like a prat, Spike getting mad only makes it worse* Nothing like a bit of 'ruff' mate.. *Gigglesnort*

*Spike rolls his eyes and huffs.*

Of course they teach us combat skills. I do fighting practice every night. They just don't let... fledges my age... go mucking about with crossbows, that's all.

Yeh, you can hit a moving target, and you can also hit one of your minions and dust them and then where'll you be?

*Spike glowers at Corvo when he starts sniggering madly, then just smirks and puts up two fingers.*

You, you'd like a bit of rough, wouldn't you? Bend over and you can stick it up your arse- there ought to be plenty of room up there.

This exactly the sort of reason I'm glad djinni aren't into 'family ties' as it were.

No kidding. You'd probably have to wear harem trousers.

Say what you will---those things are comfy.

*lifts his chin a bit*

*little snerk*

Oh, I'm sure. And what about those nappy things that the eunuchs wear? Has Eike ever mentioned if they're comfortable?