(no subject)

[sizeofatrophy.livejournal.com]

I am Bridezilla. Hear me roar.

Comments

[graftedscion.livejournal.com]

You are? Why?

[sizeofatrophy.livejournal.com]

I cursed out a bakery.

[graftedscion.livejournal.com]

Did they do something wrong?

[sizeofatrophy.livejournal.com]

They initially quoted me one price on my wedding cake and called back to say it was more expensive. I told them "Like fucking hell it is."

[graftedscion.livejournal.com]

That is not so bad. They were trying to rip you off.

[sizeofatrophy.livejournal.com]

Oh, I'm not ashamed. It's a little more than two weeks until my wedding, I'm fully entitled to get bitchy.

[graftedscion.livejournal.com]

Did they revert to the original price?

[sizeofatrophy.livejournal.com]

Not yet. I'm going in tomorrow to make them cower in fear face-to-face.

[graftedscion.livejournal.com]

Good luck! What will your cake look like? What colors are you having?

[sizeofatrophy.livejournal.com]

Three tiers, white with wisteria colored satin ribbons and sugar flowers.

[graftedscion.livejournal.com]

That sounds beautiful!

[anold-soul.livejournal.com]

Okay.

[sizeofatrophy.livejournal.com]

I strangled Strudwick today.

[anold-soul.livejournal.com]

Tell me more of this story!!!!!

[sizeofatrophy.livejournal.com]

I passed Strudwick in the halls on my way to the copy room to make copies of my midterm and we started talking. At first it was all school and taxes and, well, small talk. And then:

"You know, Mary, you're making a mistake."

I asked him what he meant and he said I was going to regret marrying Dick and that Dick was "ruining me." I told him to knock it off. He continued, so I grabbed him by the throat and told him "Fuck you."

And then I walked off.

And now I've got to take a week off for "mental health."

[anold-soul.livejournal.com]

They gave you a whole week? That's great! You should go to a spa or something.

[sizeofatrophy.livejournal.com]

Hah. I wish. I've got so much going on right now. I have to confirm and meet with everyone about the wedding and Dick's moving his stuff in this weekend.

[anold-soul.livejournal.com]

If Dick's moving his stuff, what do you have to do?

At least take a moment to put cucumbers on any available orifices.

[sizeofatrophy.livejournal.com]

Help him. And make sure he doesn't break anything.

What do the cucumbers do anyways?

[anold-soul.livejournal.com]

I have no idea, but you can eat them after.

[sizeofatrophy.livejournal.com]

Mmm. Cucumbers.

I think I'm curling up with a trashy novel and red wine.

[magicanyway.livejournal.com]

Ooh! I'm getting married. Maybe I'll groomzilla.

*frown*

I am so far from a groomzilla. I'm bad at this. I can't even find the right color waistocat!

[sizeofatrophy.livejournal.com]

What colors are the bridesmaid dresses?

[magicanyway.livejournal.com]

Light Green. Beautiful light green. With orange and pink calla lillies. And the most beautiful bride in the world.

My fiancee wants me to wear dark brown, like chocolate brown, but I've not had luck finding nice brown vests and ties. I think maybe a green tie to match the dresses but I don't know.

We're marrying in the desert at sunset!!

[sizeofatrophy.livejournal.com]

Match the flowers and wear an orange tie. Have your groomsmen match the bridesmaids.

I'm marrying on Valentine's Day at the old courthouse. ...It's a real ceremony, not just signing papers. I just don't trust Dick in a church.