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Does that call for some kind of physical punishment?

There's a rather large part of me that says, yes. But then, not sure if physical punishment would really affect him these days.

I see. Coworker? Relative? Flatmate? Lover? This is important in determining a suitable punishment.

Owen is a co-worker.

Ahh. Well, the sky's the limit on retribution then. If the physical route is out of the question, you could always blast some really annoying music.

Really annoying music. Hmm. Actually, that's probably one of very few things that I could do to annoy him. Thank you.

You're welcome. I'm glad that I could help.

I'm Tonks by the way.

Nice to meet you, Tonks. I'm Ianto. Ianto Jones.

So dare I ask, how does one, who isn't named Tonks, manage to break a coffee machine?

Owen has no respect for the time and effort that goes into preparing a perfect cup of coffee.

My ideal cup of coffee is one that someone else makes. You're talking to a girl that should be barred from most kitchens.

I am extremely happy to be the one making the coffee. I'm something of a control freak.

Yeah? Do the grounds have to be perfectly level? Must filtered water only be used?

I mean, that's cool and all. There are worse things to be a control freak about.

That's exactly how it has to be done. Plus the milk has to be steamed to precisely the right temperature, it has to be poured the right way, etc, etc.

Do you have a favorite kind of milk to use? Are you so bad, that you have to check the ceramic content of your cups?

It really depends on who I'm making the coffee for. I, personally, like my coffee straight up; no milk, no sugar. Most of my co-workers, however, are full cream milk all the way.

That's a hardcore cup of coffee. Myself? I like my sugar with coffee and cream.

You could always poison his tea.

I did think of that one. Problem is, he doesn't drink tea anymore and I don't think poison would work either.

Does he eat brains?

Not the last time I checked.

Well, that's a relief. Zombies are a pest to have around.

Still, breaking one's coffee machine would be justifiable homicide, I would think. I know I can't function without the stuff.

Yes, and I now have three people, plus myself all trying extremely hard to function on the unidentifiable cups of sludge the coffee shop on the Plas has served up this morning.

Do you need a hand fixing it? I'm very good with mechanical things.

Thank you, but I think I have it under control. Just need the boss to sign off on the expense claim.

I'm sure he will. And if he doesn't, feed him the worst coffee you can find.

...

I am so sorry. That's--that's just horrifying.

Don't worry, you'll get through this. It's important to have a good support system in place. Don't be ashamed to lean on Starbucks until you feel you're ready to move on to another coffee machine.

Just hang in there. You'll be okay.

Starbucks Cardiff is seriously lacking in anything resembling a decent cup of coffee.

I think that I can probably fix the current coffee machine, the idea of getting a new one is just horrifying.

I've run into that problem too.

Which is why I keep a French press pot on my desk.

I have a French press pot at home. It's a nice alternative.

I don't think Starbucks would cut it. Have you ever been to Europe? The food is awful but I've NEVER had a bad beverage. Coffee, tea, even their Fanta tastes better. And considering he does it himself, it's probably even better.

...

Great now I want coffee.

Mmmm. Coffee

I've been to Europe once. A week in London and a week in Paris. My high school graduation gift. My Dad and I had a great time. The English food was...yeah, it was horrid.

What's wrong with the food here?

How dare he!

Indeed.

You should lock him up or demand that he pay for a new one. Or do both.

I really hope you're not referring to me, and if you are? It was like that when I got there.

No, no, it was Owen and the taking out of frustrations on the innocent machine.

Although, I suppose that by default it could technically be considered your fault.

I assumed it was Owen, but then again I'm also not big on assuming things around the Hub these days. Days go missing, Owen's apologizing with flowers, things aren't exactly as un-normal as usual.

Oh sure... always push the blame onto me.

Oh dear.

It'll be a problem next time Jack calls us in at five in the morning.

Probably quite soon, then.

Is just getting a new one out of the question?

I suppose not. But I would really rather fix this one. I've just got it calibrated the way I like.

Good luck.

I almost said something about how I had no idea it could be so complicated, but you've made that quite clear.

Sacrifice him to the dark gods of the French Roast.

A fitting punishment.

There's a big, bright, toothy-grin for Ianto. She knows one of his alternates, and so by extension she's predisposed to like all varieties of Iantonis Cardiffenis.

"Exactly. You able to fix it or do you need a new one?"

I'm not a hundred percent sure at this point. Hopefully I'll be able to fix it, I don't really like the idea of getting a new one.