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To err is human. To forgive...

Let's say forty and change.

That's really not that bad.

I mean--older guys flirt with young girls all the time, I don't mind. Honest. I don't want you to think I'm, you know.

...unavailable, because I'm not, exactly...

No, you're just interested in a girl that upset you. At least last we spoke.

Hey. She's not interested in me, and I can respect that and move on. More fish in the yadda yadda.

Don't think you're a rebound, either... I get hurt deep, but I get over it quick.

Is that your way of saying that if I asked you out you would say yes? I admit, I've quite thought you had ruled me out of such realms. If only for the company I keep.

I--it's--my way of saying I wouldn't be opposed, to--Lola, it's not that. You can do better than me.

...what.

I don't even have words! You are the biggest fucking waste of my good looks I can possibly imagine.

Why, because I want a lady who's been nothing but nice to me to know what she's getting herself into?

Just because my heart's not colder than a narwhale's nads doesn't mean I'm incapable of appreciating a beautiful woman.

For fuck's sake. Have you ever been on a date before? Ever?

And I mean an actual date, not taking your sister to prom or whatever I'm sure you had to resort to, with a personality like yours.

I have to admit, I'm very impressed. That has got to be the sweetest rejection ever.

Okay--you remember you told me your ex gave you a million bucks after you got his bank account number?

Well. I get about five hundred bucks every holiday. I'm a college student. You know? Linty pockets and all, I'm not trying to say I'm hard done by, but I'm jobless, and you deserve somebody who'll, take you out, treat you--wine and dine you... you're a proper lady. A real, proper lady.

The only thing I can boast is that I'd never set you on fire.

If we're going to be completely honest? He didn't give it to me. He gave me the bank account number and I took the million. Splitting hairs, really, but I just thought I would make that distinction. He tried to have me killed to hide he was that stupid.

Jason, you needn't explain it. Not as if I'm going to be angry you turned me down. Like I said, the sweetest rejection ever.

...that makes much more sense.

I didn't exactly tur--Lola--can we go somewhere and talk about it?

Opportunistic of me, I admit.

Certainly. Whatever you'd like, Jason, though I am not upset if that's what you're worried about. And if you're certain I won't make an attempt on your virtue.

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