sixwordstories | (no subject)

*cocks his head, considering the question*

Control. You have absolute power over the life you're about to take. *snorts* It's probably the same reason why I love my job so much.

A lot of murders get the same kind of thrill.

*chuckles* Don't give me ideas! I would most certainly love to get rid of a couple of mongoloids that unfortunately work for my agency.

Really now? What's the name of your agency?

Sterling Cooper Draper Pryce. It's an advertising agency, one of the finest in New York. In fact, we recently won a CLIO for one of our commercials.

I've not heard of it. I change the chanel when the adverts are on.

Let me guess. You don't buy things either.

Of course I do. But I only buy the things that I need.

But then, the things you buy, you buy them because of us. Because you have a choice and we tell you what you want.

The things I buy, I buy because they're best suited for the job I want doing. Or, they're the cheapest.

The cheapest is also advertised. Trust me, I work with numbers.

That may be so, but advertising doesn't work on me. I can think for myself.

But that's the beauty of it! Advertising gets in your head, whether you notice or not.

Name one thing you think I've bought that I don't need.

It could be anything! A magazine, a television set, a new purse for your wife or your favourite brand of beer.

... A purse for my wife? Why would any advert convince me to buy a woman's item?

Most husbands are eventually confined to the dog house.

*snorts* Maybe I should have bought her the purse afterall.

Possibly. *shakes his head* I'm grateful for Trudy's understanding, really. That woman is a doll.

I assume Trudy is your wife? Not an actual doll?

*pulls a face; what kind of joke is that??*

Yes. Trudy is Mrs Campbell.

*makes another amused sound at that*

She still sounds like a doll.

Excuse me? *raises his voice*

*puts on a voice which is a fair impression of Shawn*

The Trudy Campbell Doll. Now with matching purse.

*just watches him, completely and utterly speechless*

.....

*raises a hand, as if putting some space between them*

Look, whoever you are, I realise that you probably have reduced mental capabilities and I don't want to engage in a fight with someone of your kind. But you ought to respect my wife's name.