sixwordstories | (no subject)

Scotch-Irish, actually. Is it that obvious? Must be the hair.

Too late for ... ?

I'm ripping off a british show. Get in the boat! *ducks back n for more drinks and to figure out how to work the controls*

*side-eye*

Not like I have anything better going on today ...

*snags her bag and climbs aboard*

So, how did you teleport a boat into a gym, anyway? That's a trick ...

*presses the wrong button and crashes into a wall*

...Giant jellyfish. They're coming for everyone.

*hits the console*

WORK!

... presumably, as punishment for all those centuries of sushi?

You know, you could probably use some help.

World domination.

*she takes a few swigs from the bottle and staggers*

Yeah, help. Do the thing.

The ... the thing? I was thinking along the lines of intense therapy, and that's not really my schtick. Whoa ... *extracts the bottle from Janie's hand* You really shouldn't drink and ... teleport.

*mumbles something about therapy, and points to the console, before reaching for the bottle again*

*notices that the console is made up of old analog telephones, a jack-in-the-box, a toaster, a pedestal mixer, a reel-to-reel tape recorded and a kerosene lamp*

... rummage sale?

Mom built it. *mumbles about her being cheap*

I can't find the button. It's programmed.

Oh, you mean this?

*presses the button between the mixer and the lamp*

*Janie has left the building. Actually, she's passed out drunk for a few minutes while the boat skids into a nightclub*

*...What? She's drunk, so yeah. Random.*

So ... after all this, we're going clubbing?

*exasperated sigh*

Totally not dressed for it.

*the club might be playing a Nickleback/Creed mix right now, and EVERYONE is dancing to it*

*oh and Janie is still out*

You know ... not the way I thought my day would turn out.

*considers the merits of waking Janie vs. pressing the button again ... and presses the button again*

*she's still out, and they're stuck at the night club. Also, no one seems to notice the BOAT that skidded in out of nowhere and destroyed a few tables*

Okay, hon. Nice job materializing in my gym and whisking me away to

Holy shit, does that guy have scales?

to who-knows where, but you need to wake up.

*splashes Janie's face with whatever's in a conveniently-placed glass*

*It's water, but it wakes her up* What? Hi, I'm.

Who are you?

You first, seeing as how it's your boat and all.

Janie. *she gets up and finds a towel to wipe off her face*

I don't remember what or who but... *Janie peeks her head out, then ducks back in*

What planet are we on?

One that includes lizard-people who don't dance well, apparently.

*she gets a calculator out, and punches numbers in for a few seconds, then moves on to what looks like a walkie-talkie*

They're not people. This is really bad. Um. Sprinklers. Can you get to the water supply? Yes. I need you to add something to it, and I'll start a fire to set it off?

*confused look*

Umm ... what do you want me to add to it, and why?

Lime. They're allergic to it...

What's your name again? I don't think you gave it to me.

Lime? So, you want to give a roomful of reptiles anaphylactic shock?

No, I didn't give it. What's yours?