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Just... Don't talk about hell to me, alright?

Lucifer's face lights up. His night just got a whole lot better.

"Sammy boy! What a pleasant surprise."

No. You don't call me Sammy. [If Sam only had the courage, he would punch Lucifer in the face. But he was smarter than that]

Lucifer's smile only got wider.

"I've really missed you," he feigned a pout. "It gets lonesome without you to keep me warm."

[Sam's jaw clenched. No. He wanted to keep this memories out of his head, not get reminded of them] Well, the feeling isn't mutual. Just... No. I don't want to remember it.

"Oh remember it, Sam. We had a lot of fun you and me," Lucifer beamed. "You know, you're always welcome back."

No. You're down there and you're not real. I'm never coming back. Dean saved me.

"Whaddaya mean I'm not real? I'm just as real as you. I'm just as real as your brother. He was fun too."

[Oh, Adam. Sam still felt incredibly guilty that Adam still had to suffer down there] Dean says you're not real. You can't be real.

"Oh Dean just didn't like to be my playmate. He was too busy being, y'know, suspended by hooks."

An' you'd know this, why?

Lucifer smirked. "Because I've been banished there since ancient times."

*okay, this guy is possibly some kind of nutjob, or...*

Riiiiight. So where's yer pitchfork, lil' Nicky?

[Lucifer cocked his head to the side, narrowing his eyes.]

You obviously have no idea what you're talking about.

What, an' you do?

I am He. I am who I am, as my Father would say. I know the very depths of hell and I have seen the pain and suffering. I have felt it. You have not. Therefore, you do not know what you are talking about.

*oh, Victor believes in Hell alright. He believes in Hell and the Devil, in Sin and Judgement, and deep down, there is a part of him which still fears damnation. He just doesn't believe that the guy standing in front of him is the real thing*

Okay, sure, I'll humor ya. How's Ted Bundy doin' these days, huh?

Lucifer's eyes narrow to slits. "No better than you will come thirty, forty years from now."

Sure, sure. An' don't tell me, he's gettin' regularly buggered by Saddam Hussein?

"You really think you're funny, don't you?"