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Well to be fair the joke was told to me by a five year old, so... There should have been a minimal humor disclaimer.

Why don't you try something a little more adult, hm?

Now that I'm on the spot, I'm pulling a blank. That's how awesome I'm not right now.

Come on you can do it. I have faith.

Okay, okay... So a couple of hunters are out in the woods when one of them falls to the ground. He doesn't seem to be breathing, his eyes are rolled back in his head. The other guy whips out his cell phone and calls the emergency services. “My friend is dead! What can I do?” he says.

The operator, in a calm voice says: “Just take it easy. I can help. First, let's make sure he's dead.” There is a silence, then a shot is heard.

The guy's voice comes back on the line. He says: “OK, now what?“

[Selene laughs pretty hard at that, even covering her mouth(to cover her fangs) as she does.] See? That was funny!

Definitely better than my first attempt. Which means I'm only okay at telling jokes.

I must admit, if told to check to see if someone was really dead, I may have had the same reaction.

Have a weapon on hand at all times, huh? [It's meant to be a joke. But honestly, the more he learns about Selene, the less surprised he would be if her answer were yes.]

Some women carry lipstick and powder for their noses, I have a gun.

Well, who wants to be some women, right?

I certainly don't. However, I believe most men would like it if I were.

If they try to change you they aren't worth it. So don't change, alright?

Easier said than done. I will try though.

Yeah, yeah I know it's easier said than done. My ex was... a piece of work. But when you're in the thick of it you don't always see it, you know? That's what friends are for, I guess.... or overprotective big brothers. But if I see someone piece of working you, I'll let you know.

The man I am seeing now, if you can call it that, he tells me he wants me to be me. He doesn't want to put me on a 'leash' but more often then not we end up fighting about what I am and how I do things. It's all very....confusing. [She laughed.] I'd appreciate that. I have no brothers and very few friends.

Yeah, you have me. And I know I wish someone would have said something to me before they did so... Could it be because he's just worried about you? The arguing.

May I ask what happened? [Selene sighed.] I fear the only thing he is worried about is how much trouble I might cause him or his family. It shouldn't bother me as it does, it's just sex.

Uh, yeah. That's a problem. It would bother me too. [Mark hesitates.] With Adam, he was my everything but I wasn't his. He made me think I was though... kind of strung me along, said all the right things to where I was bending over backwards for him. It was pretty much psychological abuse, and I let it happen because I loved him and I have this crazy notion that I can fix everything, that I could make all his drama go away. And looking back on it, all the signs were there. Maybe I just didn't wanna see them. Walking in on and some other guy in my bed, yeah. I saw that. [He smirks.] And everyone around me told me they could tell what was going on. I always wondered why if they could tell they never said anything to me. They just let me exist like that... in that situation.

Selene, I let him change me cause I wanted so badly to be loved, to be someone's everything. And... really all he was thinking about was himself. Don't let that happen to you.

Now you understand why I carry a gun everywhere. [She teased with a half smile, trying to keep the conversation from getting too dark.]

I'm trying not to let that happen, it's so very complicated. [She rubbed a hand over her eyes and sighed.] Come now, we must speak of something....happier? Or do something. I've lived in this city for some time now and I think I've mostly seen the inside of my office, my penthouse and the sewers at night. Show me something that will make us both smile.

[Mark actually laughs.] I'd be afraid I'd misfire.

How about some dancing? I haven't gone dancing in forever. I'll even buy you a beer.

Baseball bat?

[Selene laughed a little.] I could dance. Wait, I still owe you a drink. I'll buy you a beer and myself a proper drink for a lady. [She teased.]

Oh you like those fruity drinks, huh? [Teasing right back.] Sounds good to me.

Edited 2012-06-05 22:19 (UTC)

You're a proper brat! [She laughed.] Tequila. As fruity as I get....wait...does wine count? It's made of grapes.

Oh man. I lose all my brain thinking power when I do liquor... or wine. It's pretty funny actually, kind of embarrassing. So I only drink liquor when I'm around my brother Peter cause I know he won't let me do anything completely stupid. [He smirks.] That's pretty bad, huh?

[As they walk, he's looking for a bar open somewhere that doesn't have a line to get in going out the door.]