(no subject)

[ofdrumsthesound]

*Looking for something good to eat.*

Comments

[reality_hopping_genius]

[You mean someone, right? Because right now a certain former Psy-Ops officer is dragging two hooded men by their ankles. In a fury he tosses both of them to the Master.]

I only have one request: let them feel it as long as possible.

[ofdrumsthesound]

*Someone is good.*

What did they do?

[reality_hopping_genius]

They tried to build a gestalt weapon: a psychic WMD, if you will.

[ofdrumsthesound]

Idiots. Who were they aiming it at?

*He pokes one, thoughtfully, then starts pullng things out of his pocket. Pope's pear, Spanish tickler, thumbscrews, charcoal, lighter fluid, inexplicable 8-foot-long cooking spit . . .*

[reality_hopping_genius]

The Western Hemisphere.

[ofdrumsthesound]

Well, that's stupid. And from your anger . . . torture setting?

*He grins at his lunch and shakes one awake.* Hi there! I'll be your murderer this evening, so please attend carefully. You have a choice of torture devices, pick one or I'll do it for you, and once we're done you'll be my snack.

[reality_hopping_genius]

I don't put up with mass genocide via psychic weaponry, even if it can't quite kill me. Since these guys are apparently refugees and followers of the teachings of the Fifth Reich from back home, the world court that convicted them put their punishment in my hands.

I felt your touch more fitting.

[ofdrumsthesound]

The Fifth? Yikes.

*He grins.* I'm glad to know you thought of me.

*Apparently the Master likes the sound of breaking fingers. Snap snap, snap, snap snap snap, snap snap snap snap. It's almost musical.*

[reality_hopping_genius]

Believe me, you don't want to know. It was a hideous affair.

Man, if you did that just right you could almost get the Tetris music from these assholes for a brief moment.

[ofdrumsthesound]

*He giggles.* I like the way you think.

*Then he stomps on the man's bare foot.* Staying for dinner? You don't have to partake, although it would be nice.

[reality_hopping_genius]

Like I'd just drop off food and leave. That makes this sound like a charity case instead of an entertaining evening. I don't think I could derive enough entertainment watching you work these kinds of idiots over.

Something tells me if more 'world conquerors' knew this to be the fate awaiting them, they might pause and reconsider.

[ofdrumsthesound]

Might, might not. I'm not sane enough for torture to stop me . . .

*More bones are snapped. After a bit that gets dull, though, and out comes a knife.* Mind if I ready him for cooking? Don't worry, I won't kill him yet.

Shall I make his friend watch?

[reality_hopping_genius]

Better he listen. His imagination can fill in the rest. As for readying him, be my guest. Don't make him too spicy and I might even partake, if the offer remains.

[This of course is followed by the other hooded individual screaming through the cloth covering his face, swearing in German about how mad Harding is.]

[ofdrumsthesound]

Of course. You're a friend, the offer is always on the table. *And then he's pinning his victim down, using the knife to remove the man's large intestine and other inedible bits.* Spread your legs for the cooking spit, human, I'm hungry.