[Cuts the entire burrito into precise bites and begins mowing through them as if they were snack cheeses on a variety plate. Because if it's going on the internet, she doesn't want BBQ sauce in her eyebrows.]
I'm making a point! Y'know how most people get through this much food? By inhaling it before their gut realizes what they're doing! A steady pace, now, that's impressive...and way less likely to end with somebody yarfing all over the floor.
[halfway through the burrito, swaps off to the mac 'n cheese]
You wanted cupcakes? Why doesn't anyone ever tell me anything? I made- well, okay, I bought it, but it LOOKS homemade. It's just a regular cake. With sprinkles. It's almost a cupcake!
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I'm gonna need more napkins.
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Can I record this so when you devour that thing I can shame the bastard on that TV show?
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[halfway through the burrito, swaps off to the mac 'n cheese]
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Thank god we aren't in my car.
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Whaaaat? Look at how neat I'm being!
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I just mean, most of the really GOOD TASTING stuff are the LEAST HEALTHY bits!
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