Matthew Callahan (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
onthe_threshold) wrote in ![[community profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/community.png)
sixwordstories2012-09-24 04:22 pm
onthe_threshold) wrote in sixwordstories2012-09-24 04:22 pm
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[Perusing baby strollers with deadly seriousness.]
These things are expensive. And... complicated.
I think we need a double one. Do you get them wide, or long? Are the beverage holders standard? How do you put them in a car?
I think we need a double one. Do you get them wide, or long? Are the beverage holders standard? How do you put them in a car?
...I think they all come with beverage holders. That's good. I think... the not-wide ones are better, where one kid is in front. Or would that make one feel neglected?
What do you think, honey? [And he looks up to see her filming him.] Uhhh.
What do you think, honey? [And he looks up to see her filming him.] Uhhh.
Edited 2012-09-25 02:31 (UTC)
[Aeron begins snickering when he starts worrying about one child feeling neglected.]
They can get the fuck over it. Narrow one.
They can get the fuck over it. Narrow one.
I'm so glad you're recording this for posterity. [He looks at the phone.] Yeah, you just heard your mother swear in a baby store.
Hm. Yeah. Narrow is better. Won't block the sidewalk. I hate those yuppie bitches who slooooowly stroll along as if the entire walkway was built for them.
Hm. Yeah. Narrow is better. Won't block the sidewalk. I hate those yuppie bitches who slooooowly stroll along as if the entire walkway was built for them.
[Aeron turns the camera to face her, flashing a grin.] Society's rules were made to oppress you, babies.
[Camera back on Matthew.] I always want to throw a firecracker under their strollers.
[Camera back on Matthew.] I always want to throw a firecracker under their strollers.
[He studies the front end of the stroller.] I'm gonna put a sort of grille on here, so we can ram other parents.
[Aeron's laugh is decidedly a cackle.] Oh, Jen might have a few strong words about that.
Yeah, namely, "put some spikes on there, you pansy."
[Aeron laughs so hard she has a difficult time keeping the camera steady.]
Ooooh I love you both.
Ooooh I love you both.
And we love you.
[He is indeed pushing the stroller down the aisle, now.]
[He is indeed pushing the stroller down the aisle, now.]
[Aeron follows with the phone, still recording.]
So we introduce the babies to blood sports early?
So we introduce the babies to blood sports early?
Oh, yeah. They need to learn.
Hey, you wanna try this thing? See how it handles? It's fine for me.
Hey, you wanna try this thing? See how it handles? It's fine for me.
I am not doing anything that involves your gaining control of the camera.
No, this is too adorable not to be captured.
...I think this one is good. [He runs it experimentally into a shelf holding bright plastic toys.]
[That sets Aeron to snickering again.] Testing its durability?
Yup.
[He leans down and looks at the wheels. Behind him, a thirty-something woman gives him an odd look, which only gets more shocked when Matt basically goes to put his weight on the stroller... which means he's kind of sitting in it.]
[He leans down and looks at the wheels. Behind him, a thirty-something woman gives him an odd look, which only gets more shocked when Matt basically goes to put his weight on the stroller... which means he's kind of sitting in it.]
[Aaand Aeron's bent double laughing, still trying to keep the camera on Matthew. That picture's going to be so shakey.]
What? They'll hulk out!
...man, I dunno, we might need to get one made.
[There's an employee headed their way now.]
...man, I dunno, we might need to get one made.
[There's an employee headed their way now.]
[Aeron sobers up quickly when she notices the employee.] Incoming. Matthew, hold the camera?
Huh? [He gets up and does so, though.]
Hi! Do these come in like... titanium?
Hi! Do these come in like... titanium?
Matthew!
[To the employee, she gives her best 'I'm just a sweet little Asian chick' smile. She actually looks perky.] Hi, sorry. Are we bothering anyone?
[To the employee, she gives her best 'I'm just a sweet little Asian chick' smile. She actually looks perky.] Hi, sorry. Are we bothering anyone?
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