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You want a real one?

'Elizabeth Rose Howlett' could probably use one. And maybe it's worth doing for real. Or maybe I've been outta school so long, I've forgotten how full'a shit it is.

If we're going to fake it may as well go one better and give you a real diploma. Maybe a college degree.

If you want the real thing. [He smirks.] I'll help you study.

I don't think I do wanna fake it! And college is like the biggest scam ever invented. Besides, dude, I'm like eighteen, nobody's gonna believe I fasttracked my way to a BA.

Just, I think I might actually be able to, like, sit down and do it, now.

Now why you gonna go do that, cher? Seems to me, you got dis far, you doin' pretty good in life.

Alright! No faking it. We'll study!

I'm fuckin' smart, half pint! More importantly...you are fuckin' smart!

If I said "To prove something to myself," I'd kiiinda be lying.

But if I said "To give greater credibility to grifts down the road," I'd only be telling half the truth!

For the record, I've got exactly zero interest in doing the BA thing. But I'll take the valid credits to score a job at McD's, because how fuckin' sad is it I couldn't do that if I wanted?

Yeah, just not in the right, totally arbitrary, ways!

Hey. Lookit me. I don't have a diploma of any sort and I'm alright.

Oh my! Dis little fille, she's a t'ief!! Hahaah! Ole Gambit, he can spot 'em a mile away. See, life, she's already taught you a t'ing or two.

Ah, but now the question becomes, why get de real thing when you can just forge one? Dose efforts, dat studying, it can be better put toward de next job!

You're also a rich dude. You could be a drooling moron and you'd still have it pretty good.

Oh shit. Why don't you just rip out my heart? I've earned this! It wasn't all given to me.

Better question! WHAT EVEN IS THAT ACCENT? 'Cahz bah, Ah'm a Southie an' yah sound like wahm shite even ta' me. [She can flip it on and off like a switch, but only after years of agonizing effort!]

Forged creds I got. But I've also got this legit alias going on and she could use a legit resume. And, okay, yeah, I washed outta middle school for real, so maybe it's be a good exercise for my attention span!

Well, no. People can't just give you the big stuff, you gotta earn it. But they can give you stuff that makes life an awful lot nicer.

A Boston fille at dat!! Name's Remy, cher, an' I'm from a little bit furt'er sout' dan you. But I'll give ya a little hint, one t'ief to anot'er...dey have da best Gumbo you ever gonna taste down where I'm from.

[shrugs] Suit yourself, but me, I say if you forge it well enough, it's legit!

Ohh, see, I never bothered goin' south much. It's hot and muggy and they've got bugs big as my face, so. I figgur I can make do with Popeye's fried chicken and skip the giant bugs and call it even.

Honestly, forgery's never been my game. Second story stuff, crowd work, that's the bread'n butter!

Gramps took me with him to work every single day. I learned to take my ideas and do something with them. Even if I failed. That's what he gave me.

....and a hefty inheritance.

Popeyes?! Dey good, but dat's hardly even, cher. Sure, we got da big roaches an' bigger mosquitoes, but our food more than makes up for it. I'll have to show you some time, one grifter to another. My treat.

Ah, I see. Course, if you want Gambit's advice, everyone's gotta start somewhere, but you wanna be the best? You gotta know it all. Or you gotta have friends who know what you don't. [grins]

I never say no to free food. Free candy, all the time, but never free food!

Maybe, but you don't get to be the best by learning from a Jack'a All Trades. You go to a specialist. [She knows a thing or two about specialists and generalists, seeing as she pulled the Jack card out of the Allomancy hat]. Crewing, soloing, depends on the work yeah?

Was your gramps, y'know [bares her teeth and makes with the claw-hands] too?

Dat's my fille. Just you keep any fun field trips with your favorite Cajun hush hush, y'hear? Your old man Logan, he might not see dem in de same fun light as t'iefs like you an' me might. [drops a conspiratorial wink her way]

Dat's jus' what I'm sayin', cher! You gotta be a specialist in all de t'ings. All de t'ings. Not many out dere dat can do it, but dose dat can...well, we be in high demand. But dat last part, you got it jus' right. Most times, solo's better. No risk of backstabbin'. But sometimes, you gotta have a partner. Dat's when you gotta make sure you choose de right one, an' dat's somet'in de life of a t'ief can't teach you well. We're all scoundrels who don't trust nobody.

He was. But not my dad.

[pauses, blinks, and squints suspiciously] A) How d'you know Logan, and B) how d'you know he's my old man in the strictly not at all creepy sugar daddy sense of the word?

[and now she's making the patented teenage 'tell me something I don't know, grandpa' face] Yeah, well, that's assuming you live long enough to cram it all in your skull.

Buuut he knew?

Logan? [grins] He's one of my best friends, cher! He and I, we go way back. An' I'm pretty good at keepin' up wit' my friends, specially de X-Men ones.

An' I do, jus' so I can make sure little fille's like you do to. [smiles winningly] Me an' de Wolverine, we got dat soft spot for de young wayward ones in common. In a strictly not at all creepy sugar daddy sense of de word, of course.