sixwordstories | (no subject)

Urge?

Oh uh.. heya Perry.. yeah. Just an urge.

*gives him the eye* Just an urge, huh?

Yep. Not any .. specific...

Harry, don't be moronic. I know it's nearly impossible for you and all, but you said this urge was back implying that this is not only a specific urge, but a specific urge that you've had before.

*crosses his arms to show he's not backing down* Learn how to use a human language. Just try.

*Sighs*

Alright, Alright!

*He says getting huffy a bit as he glances around.*

I wanna.. you know.. *Scrubs a hand over his face.*

I'm missing my old five finger discounts okay??? Well in my case four, unless I use this hand. *He says brandishing his good one before putting them both behind his back to hold them in place.*

*Perry is crestfallen but like hell he'd show it* So go back to it. What the fuck are you doing with me if all you want is a life of crime? *obviously anger but bitterness is seeping in...*

I didn't say I wanted a life of crime. Jesus Perry, don't make it sound so fucking dramatic. I just... you know, every now and then get the urge to just swipe things... little things... like this candy bar.. I took this... earlier..

*rips it out of his hands* Harry, that's called an addiction.

Fuck, are you trying to take my other fingers off or what? *He asks as the other man rips the candybar from his hands.*

Its not that bad though right? I mean, come on there are worse things I could be addicted to... right?

*the unconvinced look of DEATH*

Like what, Harry? Alcohol? Being a moron? You've already got those covered.

No... like.. drugs... or sex... or killing people...

It's all the same, Harry. *unwraps the candy bar and starts to eat it* No more stealing or you're done here, you hear me?

I wouldn't rank stealing some gum or a candybar in the same ballpark as killing someone... but obviously you would..

Are you saying you're going to kick me out??

It's all a crime. *chewchew* And what's our job again? Oh, right. Investigating crime...

*shrugs* If you keep stealing? *shakes what's left of the candy* Yes.

....

*points*

You do know that eating stolen things is the same as stealing them right?

*rolls his eyes* No, it's not. Besides, the same could be said for hiding bodies, but we certainly didn't kill those people. Unless you want to make a case that pissing on a victim is the same as killing...

So what's it going to be? *finishes off the candy bar, tucking the wrapper into his pocket.

*Head rolls back a bit in frustration and annoyance, but he doesn't say anything.*

Come on Perry, this is a recovery process you gotta give me some wiggle room here! Its not just something I can quit cold turkey and never want to do again!

I don't care if you want to do it. Do it again and you're out, it's that simple.

Okay, but sometimes, emotions get a hold of us and we do things that we don't mean to... you know?

Like, I could just as easily say, if you ever kiss me again, I'm leaving.

*Knows that was probably the wrong thing to say, but he says it anyway because he's an idiot.*

Harry, you operate under the assumption that A. I care if you stay. I don't. And that B. I want to kiss you again. I don't.

Stay or don't stay, no one's keeping you here.

Fine. You win.

*He leaves it at that, turns and walks away to go do something.*

I'm pretty sure I know anyway, but I gotta ask...what urge?

The urge to fucking steal everything I see.

Are you stealing gum again, Harry?

No, I stole a candybar, then Perry took it, and ate it in front of me. Fucking fairy bastard.

So go get another one.

Well, that would work, except that Perry told me if I ever stole anything again he was going to kick me out.

And you have nowhere else to stay. Right.

Have you thought about maybe getting a real job and getting your own place?

Actually, I ended up making a split second decision and am staying with a friend. Which... actually... was stupid, because I didn't know I would be staying with said friend, at the time. But anyway.

My job is a real job. Kind of. Whats a real job anyway?

...You have friends? I'm kidding. I'm kidding. ~~Kind of.~~

One with a paycheck?

Very funny. *He said with a nod.*

It does have a paycheck. Kind of. I get to stay rent free and I get money for... other shit...

Yeah, that's not really a paycheck, sweetie.

Well what do I know? I'm just a semi-reformed small time crook. I steal... candy bars and gum for fun. *He smiles at her.*

And roped me into your thieving ways. Smiles brightly, holding up a pack of gum.

You know, if you ever need a place to stay, you can come stay with me.

Which I'm still having a hard time believing it was your first time. *He says moving to take the pack of gum from her and pocket it.*

I know. I really wouldn't want to do that to you though honey. I'm bad news.. *He laughed a little.* I think I tried to make myself sound a lot more bad-ass than I actually am just there. Did you catch that?

Because I'm just that good. She laughs, letting him take the gum.

I heard that. And honestly, if I didn't know you as well as I do, I might have believed it. Really, though, it's not a problem. As long as you keep your hands out of the doorways, and don't steal any of my shit.