sixwordstories | (no subject)

eeedie: 'Dear Penthouse Forum' gets its stories from real life. Not jokes.

ColdSlither: Well yeah they can SAY that, but there's no way even half those stories actually happened. Pretty sure some of those break at least three laws of nature.

eeedie: There are those who call bullshit and those who decide to get scientific about it.

eeedie: Don't be lame. Be a scientist.

eeedie: Sex for science.

ColdSlither: ... ColdSlither: That is an incredibly convincing argument. ColdSlither: Think someone's done that? Reenacted Penthouse letters for science?

eeedie: Damn skippy. The sexentific process is incredibly popular among biologists and physicists alike. Time honoured tradition.

ColdSlither: Biologists, physicists, sociologists, psychologists...pretty sure it's universal.

ColdSlither: Totally stealing that line, btw. :-)

Edited 2014-05-05 13:32 (UTC)

eeedie: Which line? 

eeedie: And do sociologists really? Soft scientists always seem less likely to be adventurous.

ColdSlither: "Sexentific process." It's kind of fabulous. ColdSlither: Hey, just because they don't snuggle with lions in the wild doesn't make them less adventurous. What's more wild and crazy than the human condition, especially when seen from the inside of a nightclub?

eeedie: Oh, use it in good health. And in conquest of scientists. 

eeedie: It just seems like there's a higher chance of things turning into an analysis. 

eeedie: Admittedly, psychologists are worse.

eeedie: Dear Penthouse Forum, never thought sex would be preempted by a psychoanalysis about my father, you know?

Edited 2014-05-05 13:59 (UTC)

monsterhunter22: no way. monsterhunter22: i'm serious, unicorns are dicks. they impale people with their horns. modern storytelling has it all wrong.

ColdSlither: I'm just imagining a galloping kebab. ColdSlither: Are they intelligent? Like, are we talking Predator or Night of the Werewolf here?

ColdSlither: I'm dying over here. Oh God. ColdSlither: Do you think Steve Irwin had a whole spiel for human sex the way he did everything else?

eeedie: It's funny until it happens. Learn from the mistakes of others.

eeedie: Also if he didn't, then my devoted respect for him is undermined.

monsterhunter22: i'm not sure. monsterhunter22: they're smart, yeah, but sometimes they're depicted as nothing more than animals. monsterhunter22: which is why i want a game with a murdering unicorn in it.

ColdSlither: You know I don't really get out much, but there's a big part of me that wants to hit a club to do that. ColdSlither: "Alright folks, if ya listen close you can hear the mating call of the wild frat boy. It's sort of a chanting, and sounds like 'Shots! Shots! Shots!' Watch as his call attracts the attention of the female of the species..." ColdSlither: You think I could manage to sneak a video camera in? What if I call it a documentary?

ColdSlither: Bribe someone at Mattel or Hasbro Interactive. See if they can sneak a murderous rampage into the next Barbie or My Little Pony game. ColdSlither: I might actually pay money to see that.

Bonedaddy: Nope, really engaged.

ColdSlither: Dude! When did that even happen? And to who?

Bonedaddy: Like a month ago!

Bonedaddy: Jean-Paul - Northstar? Canada man.

monsterhunter22: get somebody that can program games and do a kickstarter. monsterhunter22: mlp: unicorn edition. save all the virgins and kill anybody that isn't. monsterhunter22: wow that sounds wrong.

ColdSlither: Unicorn Massacre IV. ColdSlither: Slaughtercorn. ColdSlither: Bloodbath on Princess Island. ColdSlither: Dude, I think we've hit money here. Know anyone good with computers? We can make it happen.

ColdSlither: Canada man! Jeez, Bones, I'm so out of the loop. You gotta catch me up. :-(

Bonedaddy: hahahah, no, he's not Canada man. That would be kind of awesome though

Bonedaddy: His name is Jean-Paul and he's a philanthropist and a hero and a skier. He's really cool!

Bonedaddy: How have you been?

monsterhunter22: definitely slaughtercorn. monsterhunter22: i know someone that can code a website for us. monsterhunter22: give him a few years and i bet he can make us a game.

eeedie: You'd be attracting a very specific sort of mate, but really it'd be a higher quality one.

eeedie: Also you're required to share this with the class when it happens.