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sixwordstories2014-09-20 10:45 pm
what_fourth_wall) wrote in sixwordstories2014-09-20 10:45 pm
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I'M NOT PG-13.
GOD FUCKING DAMMIT.
GOD FUCKING DAMMIT.
Well you just used up your one use of the word fuck, bub.
Are they getting doucheface whatshisname to play you again?
GAH!!! EVEN MY DREAMWIDTH POSTS ARE BEING EDITED TO HAVE A KID FRIENDLY RATING! NOOOOOOOO!!!
(Quick! We need some fucks!)
But I don't have any fucks to give!!!
(NICE ONE!)
High five! [high fives Wolvie's...we'll say pec, because we're pretty sure Wolvie doesn't return the high five, but Wade isn't one to be left hanging. It gets a little homoerotic up in here. Sexy porn music starts playing. The slashers get busy, if you know what we're saying. Awwwwwwyeah.]
(Quick! We need some fucks!)
But I don't have any fucks to give!!!
(NICE ONE!)
High five! [high fives Wolvie's...we'll say pec, because we're pretty sure Wolvie doesn't return the high five, but Wade isn't one to be left hanging. It gets a little homoerotic up in here. Sexy porn music starts playing. The slashers get busy, if you know what we're saying. Awwwwwwyeah.]
Maybe!!! He hasn't been confirmed yet. He's probably waiting eagerly by the phone, going, "Ummm..hey guys. You know this is all me. C'mon already. Oh wait, it's PG-13? Fuck that noise. Get Steve Carell or somebody who has no fucks to give."
Probably nobody, because it can't have full frontal nudity with PG-13. That's why I'm SO MAD. I wouldn't show up to be in a movie without all kinds of nudity!
Female. Not Spider-Man. Because I knew you were going there.
Female. Not Spider-Man. Because I knew you were going there.
Doucheface would though... he never picks good movies... except Harold and Kumar go to Whitecastle.
You have to admit, full frontal spider-man and dead-pool nudity would be fun... Tumblr would love it.
But shitty movie aside, at last the royalty checks will be nice?
You have to admit, full frontal spider-man and dead-pool nudity would be fun... Tumblr would love it.
But shitty movie aside, at last the royalty checks will be nice?
Edited 2014-09-21 03:25 (UTC)
But he's usually pretty good IN the movies!
Oh yeah, I'd make BANK off the royalties. Unless they stiffed me. Hollywood is more vicious than any crime syndicate sometimes...
Oh yeah, I'd make BANK off the royalties. Unless they stiffed me. Hollywood is more vicious than any crime syndicate sometimes...
Is he? I haven't been able to tell through bad scripts and bad directing and editing.
Wait... you did get Neph to hire an agent for you, right?
Wait... you did get Neph to hire an agent for you, right?
Not with the mask off you're not.
[She mutters without looking up from her Sudoku, DAMN YOU NEW YORK TIMES]
[She mutters without looking up from her Sudoku, DAMN YOU NEW YORK TIMES]
EXACTLY. MY FACE SAYS FUCK YOU. IT IS SPELLED OUT IN MY DISTURBING BURN SCAR CHEEK GROWTHS.
I WANT YOU TO FIND THE PEOPLE WHO WERE IN CHARGE OF MAKING MY MOVIE AND FIRE THEM. WITH THIS. [he slams a large rocket launcher onto her desk]
I WANT YOU TO FIND THE PEOPLE WHO WERE IN CHARGE OF MAKING MY MOVIE AND FIRE THEM. WITH THIS. [he slams a large rocket launcher onto her desk]
As Hannibal, he was the best part about the third Blade movie! And he played the best ME pre-ugly! Not sure about the Green Lantern though...
I DID. Imma have her fire him. Out of a rocket launcher.
I DID. Imma have her fire him. Out of a rocket launcher.
Bitch. Bitch. Bitch. You'd think you would be happy to just get a redo after that Wolverine movie they had you in.
Oh god. Hannibal was terrible though! I mean that whole movie was bad, but he was especially bad! Harold and Kumar Go To Whitecastle is still his best role.
I dunno. I think you should hold out for thirty percent... Then I can go to grad school next year.
I dunno. I think you should hold out for thirty percent... Then I can go to grad school next year.
[AW MAN THAT WAS HER PAPER!!] I'm not in the stabby or burny or other forms of assassinaty game, bossman. You know this. Just like you know exactly who's in charge of your movie, and lemme be blunt: we do not have the capital to take down The Mouse.
HEY NOW. Watch the language!! This is supposed to be a PG-13 thread! Fox will order it taken down, and then sue!
See, Wolvie shouldn't have PG 13 movies either. That's half the problem with that movie! The other half was all the WTF.
See, Wolvie shouldn't have PG 13 movies either. That's half the problem with that movie! The other half was all the WTF.
AH! AU CONTRARE! ...That's the closest I'll get to shittily impersonating the shitty accent Gambit does. But anyway. The Wolvie movie was PG-13 too. Coincidence? I THINK NOT.
MATT. THRESHY. THRESHYMATT.
DO YOU KNOW WHAT A PG-13 ME IS? DO YOU??
FREAKAZOID WITH A SWORD.
DO YOU KNOW WHAT A PG-13 ME IS? DO YOU??
FREAKAZOID WITH A SWORD.
Well. On your less murderous days that is a pretty accurate description of you...
I CAN KILL WHOEVER I WANT.
No seriously. Have you seen all my recent mini series? Deadpool kills the Marvel Universe. Deadpool kills Literature. And the next one?
DEADPOOL KILLS THE MOUSE.
Even if it's Fox that's doing this one. But I'm sure the Mouse had a hand in the rating.
No seriously. Have you seen all my recent mini series? Deadpool kills the Marvel Universe. Deadpool kills Literature. And the next one?
DEADPOOL KILLS THE MOUSE.
Even if it's Fox that's doing this one. But I'm sure the Mouse had a hand in the rating.
No way!!! He was the best!!! All the ladies wanted to lick his abs!
You do realize that grad school is way more dangerous than anything you've been hiding from in our apartment, right?
You do realize that grad school is way more dangerous than anything you've been hiding from in our apartment, right?
But The Mouse OWNS YOU. Not me, luckily, one of the few perks of being a transplant or a piggybacker or whatever you wanna call me, but your ass, he owns.
...maybe he'll pretty you up, and that's where they're planning to pull this PG-13 rating from.
...maybe he'll pretty you up, and that's where they're planning to pull this PG-13 rating from.
...I have less murderous days? [stabs a bum]
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