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If you were a man who claimed to only have done things you were proud of, I would be highly suspicious. [Grin.]

And I could help. With the pain. But I won't insist.

[Uh-oh.

If Hare can barely make eye contact and he's supposed to be pushing Schreber to get the girls, this is not going to go so well. Maybe they will just have drinks and talk.

Dr. Schreber does manage to give the waitress a little smile, but there's nothing flirty about it.]

Thank you. [It's hard to say if he's thanking the waitress or his robot friend, but he puts the watch away and stretches out his leg carefully and sighs.]

[Hare is very good at looking very impressive until it comes down to doing stuff. Then he sucks]

... Awwright so uh...

[Great]

Talkin' t'girls is uh... complicated.

I... ah... I have medicine... [Did he remember to take it recently? He isn't sure. But he's doing better today than usual.]

Hahah, and you'd be right... to be suspicious, but some... men do make that claim.

[He leans on the table and nods and looks attentive and not at all smirky. Even though he did just see what happened there with the waitress.]

What should I say?

I'm sure they do, and I wouldn't believe them, either.

[He laughs just a little.] What... was all that stuff about the beach and jazz, before? It sounded... like some kind of joke...

It was. Do you not have terrible singles adverts where you come from? I could have told you my sign, I suppose, but I predate the zodiac.

I don't know. I've... never looked. You... mean for dating? [He looks kind of embarrassed just talking about that.]

[Don't you get smirky at him]

Ya gotta... yanno ya gotta make a girl feel like she's important. Like there ain't no other girl in the whole world cept fer her.

Ya really gotta listen ta what girls say t'ya. All of it, ya can't just pretend yer listenin'.

Start with... yanno like little things, don't jump in head first. Just say hi an' shit. Yanno? Just say hi, how's she doin'? Nice dress, whadderya drinkin' t'night? Ya mind if I getcha somethin'?

Yes, those. I tend to just pick up playmates at clubs, but I've never heard a bad joke I didn't like.

It sounds a little like a psy...chiatry session. And here I... was trying to close my practice.

[He looks thoughtful.] But start with compliments?

Yeah s'kinda like that? Ya gotta kinda... y'know, know what someone wants t'hear an' stuff.

Yeah little ones. Don't go overboard, broads look at ya funny if ya get weird with the compliments. Real little things, just talk about her dress or her haircut.

Don't talk about cleavage, don't talk about legs. That's weird shit.

Yanno... conversational stuff. She'll letcha know if she don't like ya.

I don't... know many jokes, I'm sorry. Now that I'm... free, it seems I'm poorly equipped for a nor...mal life.

[He blushes a little, but he's pasty and blonde and when he blushes it is a definite thing.] No, no, I... wouldn't talk about those. I don't.. think that would go well.

[Hare can see. And he might have just fucked up talking to a girl before, but he does not care]

Awwwww lookit that, all pink like a strawberry. Gettin' all shy over that part eh? S'fuckin' adorable.

[His smile is a little gentler now.] What's a normal life?

Freedom means you do what suits you. You'll figure it out.

I am Not. [But he knows better and of course he blushes even more denying it. He's still smiling a little though.]

But I don't think any girl is going to... find me a catch. I do know how to listen, though. Pro...fessionally.

[He is still blushing a little when the waitress brings his drink.]

Hah! I'm not sure I'd know if I saw it!

[He nods and he's too pleased about having his freedom to be very bothered by anything right now.] I don't even know what suits... me, yet. But I look forward to fin...ding out.

That's the spirit. [He laughs quietly and pulls a card out of his pocket. It has his name and a cell phone number, listing him as a dealer of art and rare antiques.]

If you find anything I can help you with, feel free to call. You'd owe me, but I think I like you, so I wouldn't expect more than a drink in return.

Yes ya are. Bright red. Awww man, I can almost see steam comin' outta yer ears, just lookitcha.

[He simmers down when the waitress gets back, hushing up until she leaves again]

Why the fuck not? All ya gotta do is make her feel worth it. S'not like yer an ugly three eyed mutant or somethin'.

Thank you! [He looks surprised and fumbles around for a card, even though he is not sure his will do much good. The address and phone number only make sense in the City.]

I'll remember, thanks! And I can do a drink...

I'll look forward to hearing from you, then. Take care, Doctor Schreber.

Not... not a three-eyed mutant, no... [He smiles weakly but the blushing does die down some as he sobers. He is scarred and has a bad heart, and he isn't sure if he counts as ugly or not.]

Any other tips? I could... probably use all you've got. [He takes a sip of whiskey because that will help too, right? Liquid courage.]

No. An' hey, lookit me. Ya look better'n this, dontcha?

Don't be a fuckin' knowitall. Ya don't know it all. S'gotta be an even conversation, don't steamroll over her. Takes two ta talk, awwright?