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Sucks being right all the time.

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All the time?

Okay, okay... frequently is probably a better word.

[Snorts.]

It's still better than never being right at all, though.

Sometimes I would rather never be right. It's not like anyone listens to me anyway.

[That gets you a raised eyebrow. What happened?

Doesn't sound like you at all, Stiles. Not wanting to be right?]

Then you'd probably be dead. [You being right saved their asses more than once, already.] And that's not true, either.

[ He just grins a little at that ] Wouldn't be the first time.

Only after Plan A and B go to shit. [ He's teasing... sort of. ]

[... Point.] Really dead. [Lets not start the zombie talk again, okay? Okay.]

Aren't you the one who usually comes up with all the plans?

[ Hey, you started that one. ]

More often than not, unfortunately.

[Because you were brooding. Brooding, Stiles. Look how the tables have turned.]

Unfortunately? If you are making the plans, people are listening to you, right?

Wasn't that what you wanted?

[ Bet you're loving this, aren't you. ]

... Well, yeah. But if people listened to me in the first place, I wouldn't have to make plans after the first plans failed.

[ Also he hates it when you're right and have a point. ]

[Usually? Yeah, he would. Right now, though, he is actually a bit concerned. It's not like Stiles to be like that. He is wondering what's up.]

Then talk to whoever made the first plans and tell them to listen to you first, next time.

[Always glad to be of service. Just for your annoyance. ♥]

[ Pfft. Pffffft, nothing is up, it's just his imagination. ]

Next time, because there's always going to be a next time.

[ :| ]

[Because he hasn't dealt with you for... years, now, right?]

If it bothers you so much, just stop doing it. Make your plans for yourself, and once the others realize they've failed, they will come to you instead.

[♥]

[ Years of being annoyed, maybe. ]

Will that be before or after they get themselves killed?

[ ♥ ]

[Years he wouldn't have had if you weren't around.]

Before or after you get yourself killed trying to make them listen to you?

[ Awe, stop, you're making him blush. ]

... Point taken.

[It's the truth, though. Even if he won't really say it out-loud. He doesn't forget things.]

Good.

[ Stiles is pretty glad he's not dead either, if that means anything. ]

Sooo... you've been good? [ He scratches his head a little. ] Since we.. haven't heard from you in awhile.

[Probably more than he realizes.

And, uh. Well, the last thing he remembers is having a hole in his chest and seeing Kate's face, but since he no longer has a hole in his chest and hasn't really seen Kate anywhere (thank God), he figures that was just a really bad nightmare and that everything is peachy, yup.

Mainly since the Nogitsune is gone, right?]

I'm fine. [A pause.] You?

[As for not having heard from him in a while, well... He has no idea what's up with that.]

... You haven't?

[Maybe his phone died and he didn't notice? Wouldn't be the first time.]

[ That had better have been a bad dream, because Stiles does not want to add ghosts to the list of shit he's had to deal with in the last year. ]

Good, I'm good. You know... dealing.

[ Being possessed and then barfing up your literal evil twin isn't something someone can just get over. Even if they want to. ]

No? I mean, I asked Scott but he said he hadn't heard from you?

[ Not that Stiles would admit to maybe almost calling Derek a dozen or so times in the last few weeks. ]

[Amen to that.

And well, honesty? Stiles is dealing better with it than anyone else Derek knows would have. But that doesn't surprise him at all, funny (?) enough.

So the reply just gets a nod.

As for the rest, well, his eyebrow is up again. ~~You have a gift, Stiles.~~]

I wasn't with you that long ago.

[... Was he?]

I guess there haven't been any news. [Things are calm in Beacon Hills.

Which is odd, he will admit.]

Huh.

[ It feels a lot longer than that, but then again his sense of time was skewed up being locked inside his own head with the Nogitsune, so maybe it just felt longer than it really was.

He flexes a hand, glances down at his fingers as he wiggles them- all five of them- out of habit more than anything now. Just to make sure. ]

No news is good news, as they say.

[ That never bodes well, especially in Beacon Hills. ]

[And he goes quiet, for a moment.

He notices, that little thing he does with his fingers, and he frowns. He isn't stupid enough to think that, in spite of being an incredibly strong person (probably more than he knows), Stiles won't take time to heal.

He only had to deal with the thing for an hour, if so much, and he wouldn't wish it on anyone. To have had it around for so long, mainly with everything that happened - especially with everything that happened - well.]

Have you been talking to Scott? School's going well?

[... Wow, now he feels like a parent. Not what he was aiming for.

As for no news being good news, yeah, he does want to say 'Not in Beacon Hills'. But he doesn't. Stiles needs space for his head, not more to think (and fret) about.

They will deal, when they have to.]

[ He has certainly tried to heal, and though he still has nightmares about the whole ordeal they're not as bad now. He supposes that's something.

He still worries, still has to subtly count his fingers just to make sure. ]

Scott? Yeah, of course. I mean, unless you mean talking about what happened, then no. I don't talk to him about that.

[ Stiles still feels so incredibly guilty about Allison, that he can't bear to talk about it to Scott. ]

School's good though. Still passing, surprisingly.

[It's definitely a step in the right direction.

And well, no one can blame him for that at all.

And that was exactly what he meant. He is glad that Stiles is somehow able to always read between the lines (or figure out his silence ~~or his eyebrows~~) of what he says, otherwise their communication would be much harder.

He is a little quiet at his reply again, though, before--]

Have you talked to anybody? [About it, that is.

Derek figures as much. It doesn't sit well with him, Scott is Stiles' best friend, and even though what happened was awful... Sometimes he feels like the whole thing is being ignored instead of dealt with. And, on his experience, mainly within a pack, that only tends to make things worse in the long run.

But well, he is not going to comment. It's none of his business, with it being Scott's pack, after all. Not his.]

Good job. Practice doing well, too? [Lacrosse, he means.]

[ His body twitches a little, then a hand comes up to run through his hair, down to rub the back of his neck before both arms move to cross over his chest in an unconscious defensive manner. ]

Not really, no. [ He shrugs a little like it's not that big a deal. ] My dad's still trying to grasp the whole 'supernatural thing' and the others- [ Were Allison's friends, lovers, family. ] have their own crap to deal with right now.

[ That tiny little bit of praise makes him smile a little. ] Thanks.

Well, I'm not completely crap on the field anymore, so that's an improvement.

[And Derek sighs through the nose.

He can feel those anxiety levels going through the roof now. It's kind of what he was expecting. Mainly since the answer doesn't surprise him.

You are too good for your own good, Stiles. It's going to get you killed, one day.]

You had a trickster fox stuck within you for who knows how long, dissecting your brain with you still in it. [To say the least.] I think your crap should be on the top of their crap to deal with.

[The dead are dead. Nothing you can do about it. The living, though-- They need tending to. Believe him. He learned it the hard way.

He notices that small smile as well. It makes his eyes narrow and he nods at the appreciation, his own lips twisting a little, too, in what could be called a small smile of his own.]

It takes time. [He starts again, finally moving to sit next to Stiles.] Improvement.

It takes time.

[ It has gotten him killed, twice technically- at least that's how he thinks about it, sometimes.

Stiles levels Derek with a little glare. ] Yes, thank you for reminding me. As if I'd forgotten.

[ He lets out a little laugh in response, knee bouncing a little. ] Lacrosse or feeling guilty about technically killing and maiming a bunch of innocent people?

[Which only supports his point.

And well-- There it is. Finally.

He levels Stiles' eyes with his, expression stoic, for the most part, not laughing when Stiles laughs, just looking at him.]

Do you want to talk about feeling guilty over technically killing and maiming a bunch of innocent people? [It's calm, but there's a harshness to it, all too real a feeling, because he knows it so well.] Things happen, Stiles. Things you can't always control.

Things that you wish you could control, and that you wish you could change, but the hard truth is, you can't. It happened. It's done. You can't go back. [He pauses then, takes a deep breath-- But doesn't actually look away.]

What you need to understand is that, in the end, it wasn't your fault. It's not an excuse, it's not an easy way out for you to be able to look away, forget about it and pretend it never happened. In fact, you shouldn't. You shouldn't forget about it, you should just-- ... Face it. Face it instead, and learn to deal with it.

[He stops then, finally averting his eyes to the ground, arms having been resting over his knees, holding his own hands together in the middle.] Until you do that, until you learn to live past it and accept it as something that happened but that you managed to get through, [That you managed to survive,] you won't be okay.

[His teeth clench.]

Stop pretending and make peace with it.

[ It takes him a few moments to realize what Derek is talking about- and, and it hurts. That Derek knows that kind of pain, that kind of hurt and guilt.

He's read the file, heard the story from other sides. And the thing is- Stiles doesn't think it's Derek's fault. ]

It's not- It's not the same, Derek. [ He quickly puts his hands up to stop any reply the man might have. ]

I mean, it's similar? But it's not- it wasn't your fault, okay? What happened to your family wasn't your fault. It was hers. It's all on her. [ And Stiles knows Derek knows what he's talking about, because how wouldn't Stiles know, given he's got his nose in every case file, practically. ]

But that's the thing. This is my fault. [ He points to himself as he says it, jabs himself in the chest with his fingers. ] I did this to myself. Maybe not on purpose, but I- we did this when we went under to save our parents after Jennifer kidnapped them.

And I wasn't- [ He pauses to take a shaky breath. ] I wasn't strong enough not to let it in.

(( I have to go to bed, work tomorrow. Will reply whenever I get home! LOVE your Derek btw! :D ))

[He does open his mouth to speak, but Stiles is quickly putting his hands up, stopping him from doing so.

And, as such, Derek listens, instead.

It doesn't surprise him, that Stiles knows about it. It's been years, after all, and well, he had heard him, that first day - 'Dude, that was Derek Hale. You remember, right? He's only like a few years older than us. His family. They all burned to death in a fire, like, ten years ago.' - from then to what happened, to when Kate appeared, it wouldn't take a genius to connect the dots. And Stiles was much more than that.

He didn't know the extent of what Stiles did know (he had no idea he knew about Paige, for example), but the fact that he knew about Kate wasn't surprising at all.

It does make him feel a bit uncomfortable, however, to hear it, like that. He knows what Stiles is trying to do-- He appreciates it. Even if he doesn't agree with it. Not fully.]

I know. [He knows the fire wasn't his fault. He didn't start it. He didn't give Kate directions to the house. He didn't make Laura return to Beacon Hills alone to try and figure out what had happened. He hadn't made Peter kill her. But.] But I could have stopped it.

I could have realized a couple of things sooner. [He could have warned his mother about Kate, had he realized what she was. He could have come with Laura, so she wouldn't be alone. He could have figured out his uncle wasn't so badly hurt after all.] But I didn't. [And, in a way, that was his fault.] And there's nothing I can do about it. Nothing but accepting that it happened... And carry on. Try to do better, next time.

[Because what else was he supposed to do? What else could he do? Life wouldn't stop just because he stopped himself. Staying on the ground wouldn't change a thing, wouldn't make a difference. He had to get back up.

He moves his hand, then, to take a hold of Stiles' wrist, as he is jabbing his chest, trying to stop him from continuing to do so.]

That's not true, and you know it. [He is back to looking at him.] You made the conscious decision to do what you did to save your parents. You sacrificed yourself to save someone else. How is that a bad thing?

It isn't your fault that Jennifer kidnapped them. It isn't your fault that she took control of the currents and destroyed the whole place, setting the nogitsune free. It isn't your fault that the nemeton had gained enough strength to even bring Jennifer back and set off this whole thing to begin with.

[-- That would be Derek's fault, in fact, thinking about it. He had given power back to the nemeton. He had allowed Jennifer to live and, as such, eventually put her plans in progress which culminated in the nogitsune getting free and Stiles having an opening for it.

Jennifer, who he hadn't even been suspicious of (for reasons that he still couldn't quite understand).

The point was, sometimes? Derek felt like he should just leave Beacon Hills all together. It seemed, more and more, like he was at the root of all the bad things that happened in the place.

Not that that mattered now. He would dwell on it, later.]

Nothing of this is your fault, do you understand? And stop, while you're ahead. [He doesn't move his hand away from where it is, eyes linked with Stiles' own, in that intense stare that he does when he is saying something important.] Because I can guarantee you, right now-- If it had been Scott? Or Allison?

If it had been Isaac, or Lydia, or anyone else?

If it had been me?

[He pauses.]

It would have been over. We'd all be dead. It's because it underestimated you, that we survived.

[He learned that the hard way, too. Just because you're human, it doesn't mean you're weak. You taught him that.]

You fought against it, Stiles. And you won.

[And if that's not strength, he isn't sure what is.]

If it hadn't been you, this would all have been done for.

((ooc: Have a good night! And awww, thank you! x33 Glad you like him! I'm really enjoying your Stiles, too!))

[ He knows deep, deep down that Derek is right. Even if he wants to fight him on it, because it feels like it's his fault. That his dad even found out about the supernatural, when he's fought so hard to keep it a secret from him, to protect him. That Allison died, even though he knows he had no control over that, hell he wasn't even there when it happened.

But he feels it, like it's his fault. He can't even talk to Scott about it because he feels so goddamn guilty.

He doesn't pull away either, when Derek grabs his arm to stop him, he just sort of slumps a little like the momentum had deflated. ]

I feel like I should have known, that I should have figured it out before then and if I had then we could have kept them safe...

[ Because that's all he's ever wanted to do, was keep people safe.

It kind of surprises him, how much faith Derek seems to have in him, that he thinks that. That out of all of them it would be him that wins. The human.

He doesn't know what to say to that- if he tries it'll just sound mushy, so he changes the subject. ]

I don't think I ever thanked you, you know. For believing me when my dad was taken. For trying to help my dad save me when I was possessed.

[ His lips then twitch up in a little smirk. ] Pretty sure that'll also be the only time I'm ever able to kick your ass.

((ooc: Aweyis, able to reply before work! xDD ))

I know. [He understands. He understands what Stiles is trying to tell him, very, very well. He knows how he feels because Derek felt it too, just like he had just said.] But you did what you could with what you had. And that was already more than anyone could have asked you for.

You protected the ones you could. [He pauses a moment, again, before--] You can't always save everyone, Stiles. And that's something you have to learn and accept, if you want to survive in the middle of all of this.

[On the contrary, it doesn't surprise Derek at all. He doesn't say it, doesn't talk about it. But the thought is not new to him: Stiles is one of the strongest people that he knows. Perhaps the strongest person that he knows, even.

There are many ways in which someone can be strong-- That was something else Derek had learned. Humans had their own strengths. And it was Stiles' humanity, it was his heart, that made him as strong as he was.

He finds it sad that he doesn't realize just how important a piece he is in the game. Maybe the nogitsune realized that-- Maybe it thought that Stiles was a bulletproof way to an easy win, not only because he was human but also because he was connected to everything-- To everyone. And he was absolutely essential to Scott's pack.

What it hadn't counted on, though, was how smart Stiles was. And how much he wanted to keep his friends safe.

Derek doesn't say it, but as much as he would preach about Scott's intentions and Scott's values and how much he actually wants Scott to stay safe and succeed where he did not, because Beacon Hills needs someone strong to watch over it when he is gone-- If someone asked him where his faith lied, where his trust was? Though his mouth would say the wolf - Scott - his core would know (without an ounce of doubt) that the real answer was Stiles.

Stiles was the one he trusted the most, whose judgment he believed the most in and whom had most of his faith. He trusted Stiles, everyday, to watch over Scott and make sure he would be the alpha this town needed, someday. He trusted Stiles to watch over his dying sister (and the last person of his exact same blood in the world) when he couldn't. He trusted Stiles to be in a dream within a dream (was it?) to keep him grounded (~~and not panic~~) and let him know that he wasn't losing his mind.

Derek doesn't say it, but he was never very good with words. It's what he does that makes him who he is.

The change os subject is somewhat unexpected but not fully surprising. He lets go of Stiles' wrist, then, and returns his arm to his leg, attention going back to the floor.]

Hm. [That, together with a nod, is the only proof that he actually heard those thanks.

He won't tell him (again) how he doesn't think the Sheriff was even ever meant to be there. He won't tell him how the nogitsune had probably only meant for Derek to be there himself, protecting it from the oni. He won't tell him of the days he spent without sleeping looking for him, he won't tell him of the talks with Chris, he won't tell him what he felt when he saw him taking that (very real and very loaded) gun with him, he won't tell him how tense he became when he saw him pull it out.

He won't tell him what crossed his mind when he put himself between him and that oni's sword, in the only way he could to protect him and the only reason why he had gotten that wound where he did.

He definitely won't ask what was up with the King piece, because he isn't stupid enough to think that the nogitsune thought they would be so smart as to immediately link it to an invitation for the loft. The Sheriff had said it himself, 'This is what Stiles used to try and explain to me about all of you.'. Stiles. They had been there before, those sticky notes.

But well, in the end, what mattered was that they had managed. There was nothing more to be said of it.

The last of what Stiles says, though, actually makes him snort and roll his eyes. His attention goes back to him and he moves his arm again towards him, to touch the center of his forehead with his index and middle fingers, pulling it back a little.]

Yeah, well, don't get used to it. [He offers him a small smirk at that.

Truth is? Stiles has kicked his ass many, many times before. He just doesn't seem to realize it.]

Strength comes in many forms. Don't cut yourself short. [And he returns his arm back to his leg again.] You should talk to Scott.

((ooc: Hope work goes well! Also, I worded a lot, sorry about that. xD; ))

Would not know what that is like, dude. Maybe you should try not caring. It works really well for me.

I know... [ And he does, he knows that even if there will always be a part of him that will try, try to save everyone, as many people as he can. And the people that they lost along the way makes him want to protect everyone even more.

He thinks about them all the time, even though he never talks about it. Heather, Allison, Boyd, Erica. He misses them. ]

I'll try. [ It's all he can promise right now, that he'll try to let go of the past, let it make him stronger instead of dwelling on all the what could have beens. He knows more than anyone that dwelling doesn't do a damn thing.

The people Stiles cares about, that list grows bigger all the time. And at the top of that list are Scott, Mrs. McCall, his dad and... Derek. He thinks in some ways they're a lot alike. Derek has become someone Stiles looks up to, in a way. He's one of the few people who have been with them from the beginning and still stuck around, even though he's sure that Derek hates Beacon Hills.

And though he's never said as much out loud, he thinks Derek deserves good things for once, instead of everything going wrong all the time.

When Derek pulls his hand away from him, he feels the loss of warmth and gingerly rubs his wrist with his other hand, trying to recapture the feeling again. It was nice.

Stiles laughs at the remark and rubs his head. ] Afraid I'll kick your ass again? [ He's totally joking, he knows he won't. ]

You sound like a fortune cookie. Did you practice saying that in the mirror? [ Again with the teasing, he likes teasing- especially teasing Derek. Though he makes a face at the latter statement. ]

I will... at some point.

((ooc: Don't be sorry, the wordsiness is awesome! xD))

[It would warm Derek's heart to know that Stiles missed Boyd and Erica, too. Of course he knew about Allison, Allison was part of Stiles' pack, in a way. Derek's relationship with her had always been strained, too much baggage concerning her aunt and her mother, but he had never had anything against her, directly, apart from that wariness that came with her not only being a human but a human part of a hunter's family.

The Argents, no less.

He had feared for Scott. But Allison had proved him wrong. And hunters, it seemed, could be part of packs, too. Who would have known, right?

Boyd and Erica, though... They had been Derek's mistake. He still felt guilty about it, he would forever feel guilty about it and yeah, he missed them. But he wasn't sure if anyone else would-- Though, thinking about it, of course Stiles would have. Stiles always did. He helped Derek search for them, he helped Derek get them back, save them... He was there when--

... It hurt. All he had wanted was his pack back. It had started with this (rather childish) want for power. Perhaps a bit or a possessive feeling, too: Beacon Hills used to be his home. His territory. Now a new wolf was in town, and though he respected Scott, it was almost like he felt that he needed to show who ruled the place.

As time passed, though, that feeling was quickly gone. It stopped being about power and it started being about family. Togetherness. And just not being alone.

How well that had ended. Erica and Boyd were dead, Isaac had switched alliances and left his pack to join Scott's, something that even the family's emissary, Deaton, had done, and Cora was gone, safe, together with the spark of the Hale pack. There was still Jackson, too, but well, that had sort of been unexpected and even though they did keep in touch (mainly when the younger wolf was panicking about one thing or another or needed information about things), Derek doubted he even considered himself to be part of any pack at all.

So Derek... He was back to being alone. Back to being an omega, together with an uncle he desperately wanted to fully trust but knew (very, very well) that he just couldn't. Two omegas in a territory that used to be their own but that was no longer so. And Peter would leave eventually, Derek was sure of it. He had something up his sleeve (he always had something up his sleeve), and it wouldn't be pretty, and Derek didn't even want to think about it, because there was an impending sense of doom attached to it and well. Sometimes, it was just easier to ignore. He needed space for his head.

He nods at Stiles' words, agreeing with them, satisfied that he had, at least, listened.

He would be surprised to know, though, that Stiles placed him so high up on his list of people that he cared about. It wouldn't surprise him that Stiles cared, no, Stiles had already proved that to him, time and time again. But that he was actually one of the four people on the top of his list, up there with the Sheriff and Scott? That would be surprising. He had expected Lydia, for example, to be well over him on that list (it's not a thought brought from disdain or any sort of feeling that he didn't deserve to be cared for, but from understanding: Lydia was part of Stiles' pack, after all. And he felt the shift in the air, whenever she was around).

The question makes him snort, and he turns his attention back to Stiles, one eyebrow rising.]

You've kicked my ass plenty, already. [On the contrary, he isn't joking at all. It shows, on the look he gives Stiles, before what he says next just makes him roll his eyes again.

There we are. This is the Stiles he knows. It's familiar and he is glad that he seems to be feeling a bit better now.]

Everyday. [He teases back.] Right after the part where I mention what a pain in the ass you are. [And a small grin. He does enjoy this, too, it feels as familiar.

Even if the grin does die at what follows.]

He is pack, with you. [The alpha, nevertheless.] If you go on without letting out what's on your mind, so you can both deal with it, it might bring trouble later on. [Trust and loyalty were the two most important things about pack, after all.]

((ooc: Glad to know! xD;; I tend to do it quite a bit, sometimes. Also, timezones are terrible things.))

[ Stiles thinks about Boyd and Erica all the time, thinks if things had gone differently that somehow both of their packs could have gotten along- maybe even became one big pack one day. He knows Scott never had anything against any of them. And, yeah, maybe it was a mistake on Derek's part to turn them, but he gets it now, gets why Derek did it.

And even if it had been a mistake at the start, it gave them all something they never had before, even for a short time.

He'll think about them at random moments; something someone does reminds him of something Boyd said once. He'll see some girl in a pair of pumps and simultaneously think Lydia would hate those, but Erica would probably rock them.

Stiles will always think of Erica as his Catwoman.

At Derek's statement and the look he gives him Stiles has to look down, because it makes his chest do funny things.

For the longest time Lydia had been at the forefront of his thoughts, had been the person at the top of that very short list, even when she didn't even know who he was to begin with. He's really sure exactly when the shift happened, perhaps when he began to see her more as a person than a thing to be infatuated with.

He still loves her, of course, he'll always love her. But now... it's more along the lines of family. Like the way he loves Scott and Scott's mom. Her name on the list is still up there, just past Derek's. He's not entirely sure when that happened either. ]

Is that before or after you do your thousand push ups? Do you do those in front of the mirror to?

[ At that, Stiles just shrugs a little. There's a lot him and Scott don't talk about. ]

He could be pack with you, too. [ The thought of not having Derek around kind of... unsettles him. ]

((ooc: Timezones are laaaame. I'm in Central timezone, but most days I have to work really early in the morning so I wind up going to bed early xDD I just have one of those weird midday shifts this week. And jsyk I am a huge sterek shipper, I know not everyone who plays Derek is, so I just thought I'd.... put that out there. >_> xD ))

I really wish that was an option sometimes.

What? Why isn't it an option all the time? Here, look. I'll teach you

[Takes a deep breath as if preparing for a physical challenge--and lets it go in a sigh, becoming totally expressionless and limp.] Uggghhh. I don't care.

See? It's that easy.

[Stiles wouldn't be wrong in thinking that both their packs might have gotten along, maybe forge some sort of alliance. It was unlikely that they would become one big pack, because there were two alphas in it and him and Scott didn't always see eye-to-eye, but well. They would have been at peace, most of the time.

Derek still feels sorry for what happened, though. It's a bit of an open wound, still healing, and it's a lesson he won't forget. Though it would make him feel better, without a doubt, that Stiles shares the feeling with him, when it comes to missing them. It would make him feel less alone, through it all.

And then he would have to wonder, just what character he would be in that story.

He notices, when Stiles looks down, and he feels a shift in the room, too-- A chemical shift. Yet, he doesn't give it too much attention: changes are always happening, mainly when it comes to humans. It's easier, for wolves, to just try and filter it, though it's harder, for Derek, to ignore that heartbeat that he could have sworn had skipped a beat.

And family, huh? That would make sense. They seem to be very alike, brain wise. Derek was really never too close to Lydia, but he respects her and treats her like a member of Scott’s pack. What happened with Peter, he’s already forgiven— It wasn’t really her fault to begin with. Besides, having a banshee around is always handy. Even if it’s just to warn them of an imminent death. Better than being unprepared, right?

To have surpassed her, though... Again, unexpected. Balanced, however, since Stiles is up there too, at the top of Derek’s own list, together with Cora, both a bit over Scott. Interesting how that happened, as well.]

You’ve been counting? [The tease continues, though it makes Derek realize that he hasn’t done them for a while. There’s just been so much that has been happening that he hadn’t really had time to rest properly yet, let alone train.

He misses it, though. Running, more than anything. Perhaps, after he managed to finally rest all of what his body needed, he would make a run around the forest again, feel the trees underneath his fingers, clawing a trunk, every now and again, reminiscent of his child-play with his siblings, of marking territory that, really, is no longer his own.

Still, nothing wrong with a little nostalgia, right?

He is about to let the teases continue, up until Stiles answers him last. And Derek immediately tenses. The reaction comes even before he has time to think it through.]

No. [Simple. Clean. Call it pride, call it dignity. Call it stupidity, even, immaturity.

But Derek could never be a beta in Scott’s pack. He can help, he can mentor. In fact, he has probably done more for Scott’s pack already than Scott has done himself (he blames it on him still being new to all of this or, maybe, Derek is just too good for his own good, too). But actually being a part of it?

No. That’s something he cannot do.

He realizes, though, belatedly, that maybe that came off a little bit too harsh. So he tries to explain himself.]

Scott still has a lot to learn. And we don’t... always agree.

[There. It was a bit of an excuse. But well, it was the best he could do, the best he could say.]

Beacon Hills used to be my home. [My territory.] But it’s his, now. To protect, to keep safe. I can try to help, in what he might need, but I...

... I don’t really belong here, anymore.

((ooc: Yes, they are. xD; I'm in GMT 00, London Time. It's 7:40PM for me, now. xD; And-- /chuckles Are there really Derek players who are not huge (or at least a little) Sterek shippers? Because, seriously, after 3B it's so obvious how much that wolf cares for that boy it's actually painful to watch. Sterek is the only ship I'm fully capable of wrapping my head around for Derek without feeling OOC (for way too many reasons), so really, don't worry about that. You're not alone. <3))

[ Seeing Derek tense up makes Stiles tense as well, out of reaction more than anything. He knows the answer he's going to get before Derek even utters a word, but it's still a punch to the gut regardless.

He supposes he just doesn't get it, what it's like to be a werewolf in a pack, and without one. Stiles has his loyalty to Scott, to his dad, but it's not as deeply ingrained as it would be for a werewolf, so Stiles knows he doesn't really get why Derek couldn't just... try.

Derek's not an alpha anymore, sadly, so there would be no competition over who can be a better Alpha, and there's still so much he's sure Derek could teach Scott. Scott would likely be more willing to listen and learn now than he had in the past. ]

Exactly, Scott has no one to teach him. I mean, I know jack shit about werewolves, aside from using google, which sure, brings up interesting results, but it's not the same as having someone who knows things. Werewolfy things. Like you.

[ Stiles shakes his head. ] Beacon Hills is your home. Sure, it might not be Hale "territory" anymore, but it's still your home, where you were born. That's not something that will go away.

[ Hearing Derek say he doesn't belong here anymore feels like a slap to the face, so much so he actually reels back a foot in surprise. And then comes the panicked thought that Derek might leave- might leave Beacon Hills and never come back, and his heartbeat skyrockets at the thought.

He can't lose anymore people. ]

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