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Did one do something especially stupid lately, or are you just getting it off your chest?

Just venting. Since digging up long dead former masters and setting fire to their remains is frowned upon.

I would suggest bringing them back to life just to kill them again, myself.

I don't---that's a bit beyond my reach. I mean, I could reanimate whatever was left of 'em, but, their soul's not something I could claim.

Even if I could, Lijh would never let me hear the end of it.

A shame, on both counts. I can think of a few dead people I'd like a chance to berate ...

You'd probably need a necromancer for that.

I'm not sure if even they have a good handle on getting 'em chatty though. Alchemy? Maybe?

Oh well.

It would be a bit difficult to figure out which bones are theirs in any case. I have a whole cave full of skeletons by now.

Well.

Necromancers are pretty terrible.

They're gross. Necromancy is pretty nasty.

Maid service out of your price-range?

And yet, there's a shockingly large population of them. What gives?

My guess is they miss someone they lost. And then it turns into a huge crap-storm of stupidity and hubris.

Or maybe they really are just all loner weirdoes.

I think you underestimate the very human desire to escape death. [So, so dry. You could dehydrate fruit with that tone.]

What happened to you?

*He laughs.* Hard to get a maid out on the frontier--and surprisingly few maids are trained to clean up bodies in any case.

[ The language though! Lockhart is speechless for once. ]

Maybe I do.

*Fritz hesitated.*

Worked for a series of them. I don't know the details, but my djinn parents--who are also on my list of arschlocher--handed me over to one when I was pretty young. I don't remember them, just what the charming mages told me.

*Fritz paused, thinking of what Mir would do if she heard him talk like that. Because of the sweet German lady, Lockhart gets a half-apology.*

Pardon my Fre--German.

Oh. [She's slightly overwhelmed by the mix of emotions, so she blinks and takes a deep breath.] Are you currently in bondage, then?

[Answer carefully, Fritz. She looks like she might just hunt down the person in question and give them a good zap until they decide having a djinn isn't much fun.]

Edited 2016-06-20 01:22 (UTC)

You'd need to put a very specific ad out.

*Fritz amused himself with the idea of a Craigslist ad for such a job.*

Nope! Thanks to Lijh.

*That brought about a very chipper tone.*

Just reminiscing.

[She struggles a moment to switch gears.] Good.

... who's Lijh?

Elijah. He's my brother---adoptive, brother. He got me out of the whole servitude deal!

Well, now! [ Gilderoy manages to make that famous smile appear, no matter what, but he is very shocked. His students don't use such language. ]

Surely you don't dislike all of us? Although I happen to be more of a wizard than a mage.

Do you use the powers of magical creatures to augment your own powers?

*The terms were nearly interchangeable in Fritz's world, but, he decided to see if there really was a difference around here.*

That would be more likely to bring the nice men in white coats with butterfly nets to take me to the madhouse.*A smirk.* Since I don't much like institutional food, I think I'll pass.

Nut allergy?

*Deadpan.*

[ What on earth does that mean. Too blonde for this. ] Ah, of course not my dear boy! I am very invested in harmony between all creatures, magical or otherwise.

Theeeeen you are probably not on my list.

*Fritz gave a small smile.*

I've had some pretty rotten run-ins with magical sorts who like to use other beings in forced servitude to make themselves more powerful.

If you've got natural talents and are just using those, hey, no problem. Go for it, man.

*He grins and snickers a bit.* I think I like you. In a good way, not my usual way.

The poor things in madhouses have no strength left. There's not much life to them, generally, which means I don't get as much from them and what I do get dissipates far too fast for my liking.