(no subject)

[drop_dead]

I should go on Big Brother.

Comments

[the_greywaren]

I don't understand what is happening right now.

[drop_dead]

All they do is drink, talk shit about each other, and play games. I could do that.

[the_greywaren]

Do you want to? We can talk shit right here.

[drop_dead]

Ooh! Really? Who about? [He asked excitedly as he curled his legs under him and flipped his hair like a teenage girl.]

[intrntl_superassassin]

Are you famous enough for that?

[drop_dead]

[He grabs his chest like he’s been wounded.] I would hope I’m more famous than Toni Braxton’s sister.

[intrntl_superassassin]

Maybe they think you'll bring too much Drama to the show? Or alcoholism?

[the_greywaren]

You're gonna have to start.

[drop_dead]

You really think that there's a person on that show that hasn't had a substance abuse problem?

[drop_dead]

bok bok bok

[He settles back on the couch with a smirk.] Let's see. Who to drag? Who to drag? Ooh! So I met Catherine Zeta-Jones when I was like 13 at the premiere for the movie based on us and she told me that it was lucky they didn't hire an actor that looked more like me. So I asked her how that crusty old dick tasted.

[intrntl_superassassin]

Past tense had? Or at least keeping it quiet enough?

[drop_dead]

Exactly. Besides, drama is this show’s bread and butter.

[intrntl_superassassin]

I'd watch it but being passed out drunk all the time would make for a boring houseguest.

[drop_dead]

I would have to keep from passing out or I couldn't play the challenges. I could just build up more of a tolerance now before I go on the show. [Problem solved.]

[intrntl_superassassin]

Aren’t you supposed to not drink when you’re doing AA?

[drop_dead]

You already know I can't. Besides, I make sure to act drunk even when I'm not so they just think that's how I am.

[intrntl_superassassin]

Yeah, but I mean if you’re actually on TV and not supposed to be drinking... being drunk would be a thing. Although I guess it would be Drama.

[drop_dead]

Well no but I can't get on this season anyway. [He motions to the tv.] It's happening now. My mandatory sobriety would be up by then. I'm more than half way done.

[intrntl_superassassin]

How many more meetings do you need to do?

[drop_dead]

Like 20 I think. It’s supposed to last months but I can knock that out in a couple weeks if I hit multiple meetings a day.

[intrntl_superassassin]

Don’t they check on that sort of thing?

[drop_dead]

[He snorts.] They don’t care. I went. That’s all that matters to them. And if I happen to get an overzealous government employee I’ll just tell them that anytime I was in group I felt like I would lose control so I just kept going back.