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He can take a bitchslap to the face without crying.

I think Mr Osborn we may have differing definitions of 'best friend'.

There is more than one definition?

Maybe not, but when I think of the good qualities of my best friend I don't immediately think of his ability to take a punch to the face.

I said slap not punch.

Picking nits? Okay. When I think of my best friend's best qualities I don't put his ability to take a slap at the top of the list.

That's a pretty low recommendation.

Okay. Let me try again.

Loyalty. Wait, no he stole my girlfriend.

Honesty. Wait, no he lied about some pretty important things.

Dependability. Wait, no he can't be depended upon anymore.

I'm going to have to stick with my first answer.

Former best friend. Anyone who could do those things to someone who considered him his best friend certainly deserves a bitch slap.

For the little it's worth, I'm sorry.

We have a complicated relationship.

Thanks.

It sounds like it.

I never need to tell her what I need from her. She just knows.

Best friend psychic-phenomena is a beautiful thing.

I know. And it's for the smallest things - like knowing when I want to talk to her so she calls out of the blue, or the big things - like when my mom died and she knew I didn't want to talk, so she just sat with me in the quiet.

It's beautiful, for sure.

I love those phone calls that come just when you're thinking 'I need someone to talk to'.

Exactly.

He's not afraid to tell me when I'm out of line.

That's an excellent one. Like having a safety net.

She brings me junk food and booze when I'm depressed.

High praise indeed!

She's got dis way of lettin' me know I bein an idiot wit'out actually sayin' it. Kinda creepy, but nice in a way. An she knows when ta push, and when ta jus' let me stew.

Edited 2008-09-05 02:52 (UTC)

Creepy in a nice way? I like that. I might need to save that for my best friend!

Her credit card!

Mercenary!

Why would you say such mean things of me?

...Did you sign up for Clark's Puppy Dog Eyes class?

Why, do I remind you of your best friend? ~~cause I think I could have problems with that~~

You're using puppy dog eyes! ~~Pfffft~~

Yeah? Are they working on you?

~~Could be~~ It's possible.

Now if I could only know what I'm winning with the use of my amazing puppy dog eyes.. which, by the way, may be the reason behind my 97% conviction rate. The jury can't resist them.

Don't count your victories before they hatch counselor.

97%? Color me impressed. How's Horse?

Oh, I'm sure my next idea will indeed be victorious. After all, I learned your weakness.

I like you the colour you are. And Horse is belligerent and annoying. Gave him one more chance for a plea today but nope, he wants to tell the judge what he thinks of him. I pity Legal Aid. Even those lawyers want him finally behind bars.

She knows how to go with the flow. She's down for anything, anytime, anywhere. Nothing can phase this girl.

My Pete is like that.

You cant be squeamish and be my friend so Daphne was definitely a lucky find.

Pete is the boyfriend or the best friend?

I'm boyfriendless currently. Pete's part of the duo that makes up my best friend.

He's always got me when I need him to.

The ability to be devious, or kind, or brave, on my behalf and the behalf of others, whenever required and often when not.

Day or night, rain or shine, I know she'll be there for me, and at this point, she hardly ever looks at me funny anymore when I tell her what that week's problem is.

He doesn't care what other people say about us. He just goes on with what he thinks is best.