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(no subject)

Sometimes I manage to impress myself.

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Only sometimes?

Naw, you're right. I'm pretty much impressed with myself all the time.

Is there any other way to live?

Probably but the other ways aren't as much fun or as satisfying.

How did you do that?

Uh...I really can't tell you kid.

Is it a secret?

Well, there are certain people who can't know but mostly it's just something you shouldn't tell kids. Your mother would probably skin me alive if I said anything.

Speaking of your parents, where are they? A kid shouldn't be running around here on their own.

rocks back and forth on heals
I can take a hint. I'll stop askin'.

Somehow I don't think that's hard.

Oh I don't know. I have some high standards.

Unless you're a hardcore perfectionist or with some sort of mental issue, most people tend to be impressed with themselves at some point. Nature of the human ego.

Which I unfortunately have seen a lot of.

Let me guess, you're a therapist?

FBI, actually.

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