http://feelalive-again.livejournal.com/ ([identity profile] feelalive-again.livejournal.com) wrote in [community profile] sixwordstories2010-04-30 11:51 pm
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[Beside his bed, staring at nothing]

[identity profile] givesitmeaning.livejournal.com 2010-05-01 05:05 am (UTC)(link)
(It wasn't his favorite thing, waking up after being put in a drug induced sleep. He had been slowly regaining consciousness for the last hour, his head was still buzzing but he had a better understanding of what had happened. He felt terrible, inside and out. He felt like he was having a really horrible hangover, he almost preferred the nightmares. Finally, after fighting with himself about what he wanted to say, he turned to Megan and uttered the first pathetic word that came to his mind.)

Hi.

[identity profile] givesitmeaning.livejournal.com 2010-05-01 05:23 am (UTC)(link)
(The smile, if anything, made him feel ten times worse than if she had cried. She was faking it, pretending to be happy for him instead of being honest. He cringed.)

Do you want to hit me? I would deserve it.

[identity profile] givesitmeaning.livejournal.com 2010-05-01 05:33 am (UTC)(link)
I wouldn't tell on you. (Sighing, he looked away. If he could shuffle his feet, he would be.)

I'm sorry Megan, I...I wasn't myself.

[identity profile] givesitmeaning.livejournal.com 2010-05-01 05:42 am (UTC)(link)
(Cringing further he tried to almost hide himself in his pillow.)

I meant before that..

[identity profile] givesitmeaning.livejournal.com 2010-05-01 05:50 am (UTC)(link)
(He didn't exactly pick up on that.)

Would you? I've been stuck in a hospital for so long I've almost forgotten what the sky looks like. I just feel...(He trailed off. This part was hard for him.)

[identity profile] givesitmeaning.livejournal.com 2010-05-01 06:01 am (UTC)(link)
I'm not though, Megan. (He brought up his hand to rub at his eyes. He didn't want to talk about this, but he had to.) I'm not ever going to be..right again. Not entirely. I'll probably never be able to use my hand correctly again and the...confusion, disorientation and...fucking mood swings probably won't leave either. Who is going to hire someone, no, who is going to want to be around someone that might freak out and turn a table over just because he forgot his phone number? I can't even..I can't even stop it. It just happens and I hate it and I hate myself but I can't do anything to control it.

(Sighing, he just looked defeated now. Weak for letting it get to him like this.) I can't keep letting you stay here with me. I can't keep holding you back to deal with my baggage. I love you, so...I have to let you go.

[identity profile] givesitmeaning.livejournal.com 2010-05-01 06:15 am (UTC)(link)
(He had really almost thought she was going to take him up on the offer to hit him when she crossed the room. She had moved so suddenly, it made his heart pick up anxiously. He listened to her and had no choice but to nod.) I will never ask you to leave again...I don't think I could do this without you.

[identity profile] givesitmeaning.livejournal.com 2010-05-01 05:05 am (UTC)(link)
(It wasn't his favorite thing, waking up after being put in a drug induced sleep. He had been slowly regaining consciousness for the last hour, his head was still buzzing but he had a better understanding of what had happened. He felt terrible, inside and out. He felt like he was having a really horrible hangover, he almost preferred the nightmares. Finally, after fighting with himself about what he wanted to say, he turned to Megan and uttered the first pathetic word that came to his mind.)

Hi.

[identity profile] givesitmeaning.livejournal.com 2010-05-01 05:23 am (UTC)(link)
(The smile, if anything, made him feel ten times worse than if she had cried. She was faking it, pretending to be happy for him instead of being honest. He cringed.)

Do you want to hit me? I would deserve it.

[identity profile] givesitmeaning.livejournal.com 2010-05-01 05:33 am (UTC)(link)
I wouldn't tell on you. (Sighing, he looked away. If he could shuffle his feet, he would be.)

I'm sorry Megan, I...I wasn't myself.

[identity profile] givesitmeaning.livejournal.com 2010-05-01 05:42 am (UTC)(link)
(Cringing further he tried to almost hide himself in his pillow.)

I meant before that..

[identity profile] givesitmeaning.livejournal.com 2010-05-01 05:50 am (UTC)(link)
(He didn't exactly pick up on that.)

Would you? I've been stuck in a hospital for so long I've almost forgotten what the sky looks like. I just feel...(He trailed off. This part was hard for him.)

[identity profile] givesitmeaning.livejournal.com 2010-05-01 06:01 am (UTC)(link)
I'm not though, Megan. (He brought up his hand to rub at his eyes. He didn't want to talk about this, but he had to.) I'm not ever going to be..right again. Not entirely. I'll probably never be able to use my hand correctly again and the...confusion, disorientation and...fucking mood swings probably won't leave either. Who is going to hire someone, no, who is going to want to be around someone that might freak out and turn a table over just because he forgot his phone number? I can't even..I can't even stop it. It just happens and I hate it and I hate myself but I can't do anything to control it.

(Sighing, he just looked defeated now. Weak for letting it get to him like this.) I can't keep letting you stay here with me. I can't keep holding you back to deal with my baggage. I love you, so...I have to let you go.